While Keigo's able to hide his anger under the surface, Touya's remains visible on the surface, even if it's currently muted by his exhaustion and bandages. Tired and numb, his mind occasionally flickers to the memories of that rampage, how it felt, what it sounded like, the emotions that welled up inside him. He doesn't know if all of it will come back with clarity over time or if only a few pieces will return with attachments. But what he does know is that it changed him.
And there's no going back.
"Maybe." Touya doesn't know if a lack of pain is good. It might sound good on the surface, but pain is what tells a body something is wrong. He could break a bone or get a cut and not know until he's made the damage worse. And if he can't feel anything at all, life's going to be a fucking lonely existence. There's some mild relief in that he can feel Keigo's fingers in his hair, even if it's more a vague pressure and recollection at the moment. Phantom sensation.
The nudge draws him out of his quiet moment and the promise Keigo makes earns another round of relaxation as Touya sinks against him. Eyes closing, resting, breathing easier. "They can look tomorrow," he murmurs, voice curt and unlike the boy Keigo had grown up with. "I'll kill 'em if they try today." Something far more detached and uncaring.
The last thing Keigo wants is for Touya to be numb to anything - physical or emotional. But for now, finally awake after too many surgeries, he's grateful his friend isn't in physical pain. He knows that if that were the case, it'd mean more face time with doctors and specialists, and there's no doubt in his mind that Touya wants to stay far away from them.
Eyes closing as his hands move through Touya's hair again, he can remember those scorch marks. The sight of Touya covered in blood and bandages after everything had happened. He's had years to learn to cope with the anger those memories bring, the hatred that simmers under his skin for what they'd done to ruin his only friend, the only person he loves. But for Touya, it's all still too fresh. Those doctors are in danger for simply just existing this close to Touya.
That's something Keigo becomes even more keenly aware of as the older teen speaks. It doesn't sound like the boy he'd known for so long, but someone else. And as he continues, speaking like that... He knows that boy he'd grown to love had been burned away. It should upset him, should make his heart ache more than it already does. Instead, all Keigo feels is the way his own resolve to take them away from here burn hotter. He promises himself he'll protect Touya this time; he won't let him suffer alone like that again. It doesn't matter if he can never have the old Touya back, he'll take care of this new one the way he should have the boy he grow up with.
"Tomorrow," he echoes softly, adjusting his hold around Touya, and this time, it's so he can tip them gently onto their sides to lay down in the too small bed. "You should save your strength. You'll need it." It's not scolding or telling the other he shouldn't hurt or kill others. It's his way of saying they'll leave this place, and the unfortunate reality of it is that Touya will need his strength for them to do it.
Unfortunately, the numbness is permanent. That's what happens when someone basically immolates himself for several minutes. Even with the surgeries and regenerative tissue grafts, the damage was too severe to heal Touya back to normal. The scars are there to stay, though there's no telling at the moment whether their presence would get worse or remain faded over time. When the bandages come off, it'll probably show the full story of Touya's damages.
Touya lets himself rest again as Keigo runs his fingers through his hair, taking comfort in the gentle gestures. He doesn't feel any regret for what happened, save for not being able to bring this entire place down in the inferno. But at the moment, he's too tired and overwhelmed to dwell on such thoughts. All he wants to do is focus on Keigo's presence. Rest finally seems an attractive option. He can deal with anything else later if Keigo's with him.
"Aa." Yeah. Tomorrow. That sounds good. Touya notes the soft tilt and realizes Keigo's lying them down. He has to let the other man do it for him, limbs too tired to do much on their own after the rush of emotion from the reunion. Lying on his side in the embrace of Keigo's wings is a pleasant experience, reminding him of the times they'd done the same as kids. "All right." Save his strength. Good idea. No reprimand or counseling. Unaware of what Keigo's planning, Touya simply closes his eyes and lets himself relax, quickly finding sleep in his friend's presence.
Keigo is mindful of the way he holds onto Touya as he lets himself drift off to sleep beside him a few minutes after the other teen's breathing evens out to indicate he'd fallen asleep. A part of him is over the moon to be able to do this again after so long - to fall asleep curled up with the only person he's ever cared about. To know that Touya can finally respond to him, talk to and touch him. It's an strange happiness he knows he'll have to contain once they're out of this tiny bed.
True to his word, Keigo keeps the doctors and nurses off Touya until the evening the following day. Even then, he keeps close, always within reach and prepared to tell someone to stop or give them distance if Touya needs it. That's how they spend the next week or so as well - Touya carefully observed by the doctors who are being intently watched by Keigo. And Keigo dismisses any requests (demands) really for him to do any training that takes him away from Touya's side for more than an hour or so. Keigo knows they want to argue, but they won't. As far as everyone is concerned, Touya is a ticking time bomb, and Keigo is the only person who can stop him.
When Touya is finally given the blessing to leave the hospital bed he'd been confined to, bandages mostly gone except for a few things that are in the final stages of healing, Keigo is happy to lead him out of the medical wing. One bare hand is curved around Touya's as they walk, keeping close enough that their shoulders can gently brush one another at they go. "I kept our room the same. I thought it'd be nice if we made changes to it together," he muses as he opens the door to their room. Sure enough, it's the same beyond a couple of small things like the addition of a few books, a taller dresser to accommodate the need for bigger clothes and accessories, and Touya's pillow is nestled beside Keigo's on the blond's bed. But otherwise, it's much the same. Not that Keigo has any intention of the two of them staying here long enough for this place to need any changes. They'll be out of here soon enough.
"We can sleep in your bed, if you want. I've been washing the sheets every week so they were clean for you." He'd never given up hope that the other would wake up, after all. He'd told anyone who asked that Touya would come back to him, and he was right. Something he seems incredibly happy about as he herds the other teen to sit on the edge of his old bed. "Do you want to see some of the magazines I saved for you? I found new places for us to go when it's time for us to live on our own."
He doesn't wait for an answer, grabbing one of the magazines before climbing onto the bed to scoot close to Touya. Opening the magazine, he flips through a few pages before stopping and setting it across their laps. "It isn't open all the time, but I'll find out how we can get special passes." It's a big mall, but that's not what he's concerned with showing Touya. The place his finger lands on the page is a store front and the doors are the exact shape and size of the ones that keep their living quarters and medical from the rest of the facility. "We go here and once we're done," he drags his finger towards the brightly lit exit sign among the bustling scene, tapping it, "we'll go here. It'll probably be busy, though. If we go early or maybe later at night, it shouldn't be too bad."
What he's telling Touya sounds innocent enough, but what he means is entirely different. He'll get them an access card to get into the other part of the facility, and they'll escape from there. They can figure out the best time depending on the schedule in the next few days.
So long as Keigo isn't absent when the doctors are in his room and inspecting him, Touya's mostly cold and callous to the medics. He seems to tolerate them more than anything else, eyes lidded and expression wavering between tired and annoyed. Despite his flames being weak right now thanks to the damage ravaged across his body, his attitude suggests that if pushed too hard, he'd ignite with little care to the outcome. One final burst to try and finish what he started.
But none of those things happen. Apparently the destruction and death's Touya had wrought on his rampage had cast enough of a ghost around the staff to avoid it. Probably to no one's surprise, he's more awake and alert whenever it's just him and Keigo visiting in the hospital room. Still, his exhaustion and recovery take a toll and Touya ends up sleeping most of the time as the days tick on. The scars and regenerative tissues go hand-in-hand on his body, that T-shaped rictus grin permanently etched into his face. At least everything's the same color, though Touya heard one of the nurses say "for now" in regards to his body's ability to stay in its current state. What would happen if he tried to use his flames like this?
... just how useless is he going to be now ..
As Keigo leads him away from the medical wing, Touya's eyes wander about the halls and passing rooms. He holds his friend's hand, not minding the way their shoulders bump against each other's as they go. Feels like it's been forever since he saw this place; it's been three years after all. Oh, Keigo's saying something.
"We're going to change it?" Touya sounds confused about why they'd bother doing that. Most of the rooms are the same, little in the way of personality unless it's somehow required. But he pauses upon seeing their room again. Particularly the bed with two pillows on it. The scene brings back memories and feelings, causing a quiet well of the sensations in Touya's chest. Soft, but weak. Enough that his expression relaxes, but a smile fails to appear.
"But my pillow's on your bed." Touya takes a seat on the bed's edge, resting his hands on the rim for a few seconds before smoothing his fingers and palms across the surface. The sensation's faint, numb, in that he can feel it's soft, but not anything like he could still remember. So he stops doing that and simply rests his hands on his lap instead. Magazines? Touya lifts his head and glances at Keigo again when he mentions new places to live. Right, they had... talked about that before. What to do when they left this place.
"Mh." That's the only response he can (or wants) to give, since Keigo's already scooting over to him with the magazine. Turquoise eyes linger on the pages as they flip across the book, dropping as the document flops on his lap. A mall? He hasn't been to one of those... ever. But he focuses on the placement of Keigo's finger instead, noting the door and the hallway, followed by the skim to the exit door. For a few seconds, he seems to simply take it as Keigo means it. But after the bit, his eyes lid and a different kind of focus wanders through his mind. "Later at night. Goin out with all those people's annoyin."
"We can change it, if you want. But we can worry about that later, when you're feeling better." Though he doesn't plan on sticking around long enough to need to now that Touya is awake and can mostly move around on his own. All he needs is for Touya to be strong enough to get out of here and to the place he's found for them to bed down for a couple days. If he needs to rest after that, he can. But he has to play the part here. To seem like the doting best friend excited to have his roommate and friend back. Not someone preparing to bring down a storm of sharpened quills if it means getting the pair of them out of here. And, more importantly, he's not sure if Touya's ever really going to 'feel better' after everything he's been through. Even now, he feels like such a hollow shell of his best friend that Keigo feels his own anger burning through whatever is left of his compassion for anyone in this place.
The people here did this to Touya. Enji Todoroki did this to Touya. And despite the bright smiles and carefree demeanor, Keigo will never forgive any of them for taking a part of Touya away from him.
He feels those familiar creeping thoughts, but instead of focusing on them, he tips his head gently against Touya's shoulder once it seems the other is understanding what he's saying. He wishes they could talk more freely, but he's sure they're being watched. They can't have their prized bird harmed, after all.
"Later sounds good." There's a soft hum of approval, and he's quiet for a moment as lets himself enjoy the moment. There's lots he wants to ask as they sit there, but he's not sure where to start. Instead of speaking right away, he starts with neatly sliding the magazine away before letting one of his hands slide under Touya's, letting the other teen decide if he wants to hold it properly or not. "Hey, Touya," he wonders after a moment, voice soft where his head is perched on the other's shoulder. "Do you remember what happened?"
It's a dangerous question to ask, and Keigo knows it. But he needs to know what's going through Touya's head, how much of that rage is still simmering under the surface, and just what might be the spark to ignite another inferno.
"Yeah." Touya doesn't sound like he's up for doing any kind of planning. It took a while for his brain to even grasp that Keigo was talking some kind of code for getting out of the facility. Getting out... huh. The idea seems like a vague shape in the clouds, potentially there, but is it worth going for? He thinks it might be only so since he's weak right now. Leaving this place behind would be amazing. While Touya's strong enough to move around and recuperate after the surgeries and efforts placed on getting his body back to as recovered as possible, there's little strength in his limbs to actually make for breaking out of the would-be-fortress. But hearing Keigo talking about such a thing and knowing his friend has the intention to leave makes the idea not an impossibility. Touya wants to... but he wants to be able to and not fail trying to make it happen. A few more days, a little bit of patience, wouldn't hurt him any more than it already has. He can bide his time and ensure they make out it. That's worth the wait. Enough to recharge. Heat up. Ready.
A soft bump against his shoulder pulls Touya from his thoughts and he glances down towards the feathered sandy blonde head he's grown up with. So many times he's felt this sensation and seen this sight. A little boy holding onto his hand, a smile on his face after Touya encouraged him that they'd get stronger. Now it seems the roles are reversed, with Keigo being the one to encourage him to stay strong and smile for him. Mah, smiling doesn't seem like a possibility right now, but at least he's calm and willing to rest without medication or antagonism towards the medics tending to him.
Touya's hand is moved rather than moving his hand himself. Lifted up, fingers curled a bit at the tips as Keigo slides his hand underneath his own. Once it's in his grip, however, the burned teen slowly closes his digits around the winged teen's. Whether it's 'proper' or not is up to Keigo to decide; Touya doesn't care. He cares more about the question leveled at him. For a while, he's left to think on his own. How much does he remember? There's a lot, actually.
"Depends on where ya want me to start." Does he remember the time away from Keigo? Does he remember the training he went through after Endeavor abandoned him? Does he remember getting the news Keigo would never be in his life again? Does he remember rampaging through the halls as his flames raged around him without control, incinerating people and scorching walls black, heedless of the damage he caused? Does he remember waking up and finding out how much of himself he'd destroyed? The answer is... yes. He remembers all of that. If asked to grab details right now, he probably could, though he's likely too tired to want to give Keigo a big report. "But I remember most of it."
Might be better to ask him what he doesn't remember... which is a stupid request.
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And there's no going back.
"Maybe." Touya doesn't know if a lack of pain is good. It might sound good on the surface, but pain is what tells a body something is wrong. He could break a bone or get a cut and not know until he's made the damage worse. And if he can't feel anything at all, life's going to be a fucking lonely existence. There's some mild relief in that he can feel Keigo's fingers in his hair, even if it's more a vague pressure and recollection at the moment. Phantom sensation.
The nudge draws him out of his quiet moment and the promise Keigo makes earns another round of relaxation as Touya sinks against him. Eyes closing, resting, breathing easier. "They can look tomorrow," he murmurs, voice curt and unlike the boy Keigo had grown up with. "I'll kill 'em if they try today." Something far more detached and uncaring.
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Eyes closing as his hands move through Touya's hair again, he can remember those scorch marks. The sight of Touya covered in blood and bandages after everything had happened. He's had years to learn to cope with the anger those memories bring, the hatred that simmers under his skin for what they'd done to ruin his only friend, the only person he loves. But for Touya, it's all still too fresh. Those doctors are in danger for simply just existing this close to Touya.
That's something Keigo becomes even more keenly aware of as the older teen speaks. It doesn't sound like the boy he'd known for so long, but someone else. And as he continues, speaking like that... He knows that boy he'd grown to love had been burned away. It should upset him, should make his heart ache more than it already does. Instead, all Keigo feels is the way his own resolve to take them away from here burn hotter. He promises himself he'll protect Touya this time; he won't let him suffer alone like that again. It doesn't matter if he can never have the old Touya back, he'll take care of this new one the way he should have the boy he grow up with.
"Tomorrow," he echoes softly, adjusting his hold around Touya, and this time, it's so he can tip them gently onto their sides to lay down in the too small bed. "You should save your strength. You'll need it." It's not scolding or telling the other he shouldn't hurt or kill others. It's his way of saying they'll leave this place, and the unfortunate reality of it is that Touya will need his strength for them to do it.
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Touya lets himself rest again as Keigo runs his fingers through his hair, taking comfort in the gentle gestures. He doesn't feel any regret for what happened, save for not being able to bring this entire place down in the inferno. But at the moment, he's too tired and overwhelmed to dwell on such thoughts. All he wants to do is focus on Keigo's presence. Rest finally seems an attractive option. He can deal with anything else later if Keigo's with him.
"Aa." Yeah. Tomorrow. That sounds good. Touya notes the soft tilt and realizes Keigo's lying them down. He has to let the other man do it for him, limbs too tired to do much on their own after the rush of emotion from the reunion. Lying on his side in the embrace of Keigo's wings is a pleasant experience, reminding him of the times they'd done the same as kids. "All right." Save his strength. Good idea. No reprimand or counseling. Unaware of what Keigo's planning, Touya simply closes his eyes and lets himself relax, quickly finding sleep in his friend's presence.
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True to his word, Keigo keeps the doctors and nurses off Touya until the evening the following day. Even then, he keeps close, always within reach and prepared to tell someone to stop or give them distance if Touya needs it. That's how they spend the next week or so as well - Touya carefully observed by the doctors who are being intently watched by Keigo. And Keigo dismisses any requests (demands) really for him to do any training that takes him away from Touya's side for more than an hour or so. Keigo knows they want to argue, but they won't. As far as everyone is concerned, Touya is a ticking time bomb, and Keigo is the only person who can stop him.
When Touya is finally given the blessing to leave the hospital bed he'd been confined to, bandages mostly gone except for a few things that are in the final stages of healing, Keigo is happy to lead him out of the medical wing. One bare hand is curved around Touya's as they walk, keeping close enough that their shoulders can gently brush one another at they go. "I kept our room the same. I thought it'd be nice if we made changes to it together," he muses as he opens the door to their room. Sure enough, it's the same beyond a couple of small things like the addition of a few books, a taller dresser to accommodate the need for bigger clothes and accessories, and Touya's pillow is nestled beside Keigo's on the blond's bed. But otherwise, it's much the same. Not that Keigo has any intention of the two of them staying here long enough for this place to need any changes. They'll be out of here soon enough.
"We can sleep in your bed, if you want. I've been washing the sheets every week so they were clean for you." He'd never given up hope that the other would wake up, after all. He'd told anyone who asked that Touya would come back to him, and he was right. Something he seems incredibly happy about as he herds the other teen to sit on the edge of his old bed. "Do you want to see some of the magazines I saved for you? I found new places for us to go when it's time for us to live on our own."
He doesn't wait for an answer, grabbing one of the magazines before climbing onto the bed to scoot close to Touya. Opening the magazine, he flips through a few pages before stopping and setting it across their laps. "It isn't open all the time, but I'll find out how we can get special passes." It's a big mall, but that's not what he's concerned with showing Touya. The place his finger lands on the page is a store front and the doors are the exact shape and size of the ones that keep their living quarters and medical from the rest of the facility. "We go here and once we're done," he drags his finger towards the brightly lit exit sign among the bustling scene, tapping it, "we'll go here. It'll probably be busy, though. If we go early or maybe later at night, it shouldn't be too bad."
What he's telling Touya sounds innocent enough, but what he means is entirely different. He'll get them an access card to get into the other part of the facility, and they'll escape from there. They can figure out the best time depending on the schedule in the next few days.
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But none of those things happen. Apparently the destruction and death's Touya had wrought on his rampage had cast enough of a ghost around the staff to avoid it. Probably to no one's surprise, he's more awake and alert whenever it's just him and Keigo visiting in the hospital room. Still, his exhaustion and recovery take a toll and Touya ends up sleeping most of the time as the days tick on. The scars and regenerative tissues go hand-in-hand on his body, that T-shaped rictus grin permanently etched into his face. At least everything's the same color, though Touya heard one of the nurses say "for now" in regards to his body's ability to stay in its current state. What would happen if he tried to use his flames like this?
... just how useless is he going to be now ..
As Keigo leads him away from the medical wing, Touya's eyes wander about the halls and passing rooms. He holds his friend's hand, not minding the way their shoulders bump against each other's as they go. Feels like it's been forever since he saw this place; it's been three years after all. Oh, Keigo's saying something.
"We're going to change it?" Touya sounds confused about why they'd bother doing that. Most of the rooms are the same, little in the way of personality unless it's somehow required. But he pauses upon seeing their room again. Particularly the bed with two pillows on it. The scene brings back memories and feelings, causing a quiet well of the sensations in Touya's chest. Soft, but weak. Enough that his expression relaxes, but a smile fails to appear.
"But my pillow's on your bed." Touya takes a seat on the bed's edge, resting his hands on the rim for a few seconds before smoothing his fingers and palms across the surface. The sensation's faint, numb, in that he can feel it's soft, but not anything like he could still remember. So he stops doing that and simply rests his hands on his lap instead. Magazines? Touya lifts his head and glances at Keigo again when he mentions new places to live. Right, they had... talked about that before. What to do when they left this place.
"Mh." That's the only response he can (or wants) to give, since Keigo's already scooting over to him with the magazine. Turquoise eyes linger on the pages as they flip across the book, dropping as the document flops on his lap. A mall? He hasn't been to one of those... ever. But he focuses on the placement of Keigo's finger instead, noting the door and the hallway, followed by the skim to the exit door. For a few seconds, he seems to simply take it as Keigo means it. But after the bit, his eyes lid and a different kind of focus wanders through his mind. "Later at night. Goin out with all those people's annoyin."
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The people here did this to Touya. Enji Todoroki did this to Touya. And despite the bright smiles and carefree demeanor, Keigo will never forgive any of them for taking a part of Touya away from him.
He feels those familiar creeping thoughts, but instead of focusing on them, he tips his head gently against Touya's shoulder once it seems the other is understanding what he's saying. He wishes they could talk more freely, but he's sure they're being watched. They can't have their prized bird harmed, after all.
"Later sounds good." There's a soft hum of approval, and he's quiet for a moment as lets himself enjoy the moment. There's lots he wants to ask as they sit there, but he's not sure where to start. Instead of speaking right away, he starts with neatly sliding the magazine away before letting one of his hands slide under Touya's, letting the other teen decide if he wants to hold it properly or not. "Hey, Touya," he wonders after a moment, voice soft where his head is perched on the other's shoulder. "Do you remember what happened?"
It's a dangerous question to ask, and Keigo knows it. But he needs to know what's going through Touya's head, how much of that rage is still simmering under the surface, and just what might be the spark to ignite another inferno.
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A soft bump against his shoulder pulls Touya from his thoughts and he glances down towards the feathered sandy blonde head he's grown up with. So many times he's felt this sensation and seen this sight. A little boy holding onto his hand, a smile on his face after Touya encouraged him that they'd get stronger. Now it seems the roles are reversed, with Keigo being the one to encourage him to stay strong and smile for him. Mah, smiling doesn't seem like a possibility right now, but at least he's calm and willing to rest without medication or antagonism towards the medics tending to him.
Touya's hand is moved rather than moving his hand himself. Lifted up, fingers curled a bit at the tips as Keigo slides his hand underneath his own. Once it's in his grip, however, the burned teen slowly closes his digits around the winged teen's. Whether it's 'proper' or not is up to Keigo to decide; Touya doesn't care. He cares more about the question leveled at him. For a while, he's left to think on his own. How much does he remember? There's a lot, actually.
"Depends on where ya want me to start." Does he remember the time away from Keigo? Does he remember the training he went through after Endeavor abandoned him? Does he remember getting the news Keigo would never be in his life again? Does he remember rampaging through the halls as his flames raged around him without control, incinerating people and scorching walls black, heedless of the damage he caused? Does he remember waking up and finding out how much of himself he'd destroyed? The answer is... yes. He remembers all of that. If asked to grab details right now, he probably could, though he's likely too tired to want to give Keigo a big report. "But I remember most of it."
Might be better to ask him what he doesn't remember... which is a stupid request.