[ after all, sorcerers operate during the night. it was a lot easier to keep their activities within the rules of confidentiality when the streets are less populated; no one gets hurt in the process, and fewer questions to answer to. so, itadori is used to it. no one questioned where he's off to, and if they did, he'd tell them he's meeting with a new friend. which might not be the truth anymore, as he didn't understand how to label that man anymore.
he likes to believe this night will be different. while dabi had done his research with little success, itadori was lucky with his own. the infamous broadcast was the first hit he got as soon as he typed dabi's name, leading him straight to the video, and like the rest of the civilians, and the todoroki family, he was overwhelmed with everything. it was a lot to take in, yet it made perfect sense, matching every subtle hint dabi dropped during their first conversation and the depth of his scars. while the intention is to bring down Endeavor's creditability, exposing the hypocrisy of the hero society, itadori couldn't help but to feel— a burning displeasure by the end of it.
the question is: who is it directed at? he didn't know.
he finally reached the abandoned park, quick to acknowledge why dabi picked this location. dressed in a casual gray hoodie, black pants, and sneakers— he wasn't out to impress. the promised meal is not forgotten, as itadori would be seen holding into what appears to be a mid-sized lunch bag? yes, it screamed 'high schooler', but it kept all the containers neatly tucked in. no complaints are allowed.
that's when he pulled out his phone again, quickly typing- ]
[well he certainly shouldn't label him a "friend" right now. or ever. dabi won't ever be labeling anyone that term. friends only get in the way of a self-destructive goal. and speaking of that...
though he has no real evidence to this, itadori sounded more naive and inexperienced than stupid. meaning dabi has suspicion that as much as he's looking into the kid and researching him to find out what he's up to and who he is, there's a high chance itadori has done the exact same thing. and considering dabi's tell-all video condemning endeavor and the hero society by exposing several of their lies, abuses, and crimes, is widely available on the net and other media, it's impossible for itadori to miss it if he tries to research it. so he'll know all who dabi is, his real name, his family, some of the reason behind his scars, his goals, his opinions, so much of himself exposed in that video to the world.
should be interesting to see what he thinks out. both about dabi and the hero society. perhaps it'll make the kid look at whatever his own organization or area is and think about things more. any truths he's been blindly accepting, the images of the higher ranks in his world, whether or not he's actually thinking for himself or simply going along with a flow he has no true understanding of. if it strips him of some of that naivety and innocence, all the better.
but can he really still say he wants to be friends with a known mass murderer who has zero intention of stopping his villainy and every intention of murdering his own family members to torture and bring down his father? in that respect, dabi remains even more wary of itadori. after all, the kid said he'd get involved it meant protecting the people he cared for, and "all of society" is likely going to catch at least one of those in the proverbial shotgun blast.
he gets the text message and moves. walking around the rim of the water tower overlooking the park. turquoise eyes scan over the trees, around the perimeter of the abandoned area, searching for cars or bodies or any other potential sign of a trap, ambush, or double cross. seeing none, he retreats.
it'll be another several minutes before footsteps sound behind itadori to the side and dabi steps halfway into the moonlight, most of his upper half still covered in shadow from the trees.]
[ it's not his desire to bring it up, only because he didn't know if he wanted to get into it. it was a heavy topic that's beyond his perception and way of thinking— which left him frustrated more than anything. he should be able to pick a side, he should be able to reflect on his own affairs, he should have a clear resolve about where he's standing with dabi. but, he didn't. all he had is incoherent thoughts and guilt over being here in the first place. it started with a fun idea to waste time, then escalated into something else.
despite it all, he's still here. he's still seeking dabi. why? ... why, indeed.
within his conflicts, this whole fling served sukuna in one way or another. sharing a body meant sharing a mind, sharing a soul; he can hear itadori's doubts and if that young villain managed to fuck with his head some more, it will humor an extremely bored vengeful spirit who had nothing else to do but to lend an ear, and wait in his lonely domain. dabi has a unique audience now.
he glanced toward that familiar voice, picking up on the distance between them. ah, guarded as always. ]
I had my doubts. Not gonna lie. But ... I made a promise.
[ he holds up the lunch bag, somewhat beckoning on how heavy it is. a sign of real effort from this end. itadori stood where he is, presuming dabi would lead the way into a more private area. unless he wished to have dinner under this tree? not that he minds. ]
[if they don't talk about it, he'll be surprised but won't attempt to break that topic. should be able to figure out if itadori knows via the clues along the way. he's pretty good at watching people. their eyes, the way they look at him, their posture and how tense their body gets or any other sort of physical ticks when a certain word, phrase, or topic shows up. people aren't as reserved as they want to think they are, though some manage to make those attempts challenging or impossible. he doesn't really think itadori's one of those people. he's pretty open with his emotions, and/or covers up the ones he doesn't want to show.
it's one of the reasons he's still keeping his distance, eyes watching the other guy from the shadows smothering his upper half. dabi has no idea about the things going on inside itadori's body and mind, but he's only somewhat convinced the kid doesn't secretly have a camera or a sniper rifle aimed at him from some unknown location. which is why, when he lifts up that lunch bag, dabi finally emerges from the gloom.
looks like this shit really checks out... why the hell does this guy care so much?]
Ya might really be crazy. [for a second, the fight or flight response wanders across his mind. but dabi finally lifts his hand and motions itadori to follow him.] This way.
[and heads off. it's not a long walk, but it is a silent one. on dabi's part at least. up to the point of arriving at a cabin-like structure. it's not dilapidated, but it's obviously abandoned. one window broken in and the door isn't locked from how the villain simply pushes it open and walks in. furnished at least. a table and a couch in the living room, small cabinets in a small kitcken, a bed and bath in the room beyond.]
itadori made no attempt to break the silence, often distracted by inspecting the area around him; keeping an eye on any odd activities, noises and it wouldn't hurt to pinpoint escape routes if the situation begs for it. after all, dabi had a troublesome quirk: fire. it wasn't a long walk, true, but he still had enough time to stare at the other man's back, watching as a small breeze brush through his hair, the way he walked— the small details. ]
I don't know ...
[ he didn't even miss a beat with dropping that confession. the kitchen didn't appeal to him for some reason, opting to walk into the living room and settle the bag on the coffee table; waiting for the other to follow. he then flopped down on the sofa, patting away at the accumulated dust on the shabby cushions. he shrugged, clearing his throat before he continued. ]
I'm simply interested in you. You equally piss me off and calm me down.
[ without waiting for an approval, he begins to set up the table; taking out a couple of sealed plastic containers and arranging them. the cooked cold soba noodles with garnish/beef in one, dipping sauce in another, and a side dish of teriyaki tofu. chopsticks will be found wrapped up in a clean napkin, but— no drinks. that's the only thing itadori couldn't bring along.
finally, after what seemed in forever, under the poor glints in this cabin ... he meets dabi's eyes. that's when he realized he was, subconsciously, avoiding them. ]
[dabi's already inspected the area. he knows what route he'll take if something goes poorly. and with the rest of the trees and shit around, it won't be hard to cover his escape in smoke or flames as the forest and park burns. to say nothing of setting the entire cabin on fire. while he has no idea towards itadori's abilities, this entire setup still leans to his advantage in a tactical sense. even if the kid knows about his quirk and everything.
"i don't know." that's an expected answer. dabi hangs out by one of the walls, standing his ground with his arms by his sides, eyes resting on itadori without any intense focus. but he is watching him, letting his mind wander with the questions. did he really think this kid would have an answer? not really. never seemed like he did earlier. but it's strange for a fling to hang around with this much interest...]
I've heard the first one before. No one's ever said the second. [he calms him down? how the hell is that supposed to work? the kid still doesn't know him beyond facts and a phone call. who's calmed down by a random stranger? fits in with itadori's oddness at least. as for being interested in him, well... that's been something he's experienced already. the reason for "why" the interest usually changes.
all said, dabi's silently surprised and curious about the containers. so much of it. he didn't simply leave everything in one container and that was it. hmph... actually treating it with care. and by proxy, him. that's a fucking new. when's the last time someone outside the league treated him like a damn human being? for that reason alone, some of the villain's hackles lower. slightly. won't even bitch about the lack of a drink. he can handle without one easily enough. there's a lake out there if he really needs something.
still wary, yes, but... he can't very well eat from way over here. dabi rolls off the wall and heads over. eyeing him, but at least he does approach... and finally takes a seat on the floor on the opposite side of the coffee table.]
Yeah! Sorry about the drinks. I could go to a nearby grocery store if you want something ... to drink ... Uhhh ...
[ his voice dulls into a hushed mutter, staring at the way dabi settled on the floor; eyes wide open. dumbfounded, he glanced at the empty space on the sofa, reassuring himself there is plenty of room to accommodate another individual, and then he returns regarding dabi again— who chose to sit on the dirty floor instead. that was a better option in his mind over joining itadori? was it that bad? did he hold that level of skepticism towards anyone new coming into his life? to carry such heavy fears— must be exhausting.
slowly, he offers the villain his chopsticks— holding it out and waiting for him to accept it. yeah, he could've allowed dabi to pick them up on his own, but there's an urge to break this cold reserve between them. something as subtle as an accidental touch between their fingers could help ease the tension. or, that's what he hoped for. ]
You don't have to sit on the floor, you know. I have no reason to attack you. If anything, I'm at a disadvantage in this small cabin.
[ here's a hint. a remark on dabi's quirk. while itadori didn't necessarily fear such a power, which might be part of being as simple-minded as he is, he still understood it's not a smart move to start shit when he's surrounded by wooden walls, cornered, and with no chance to escape. he should be the one on edge, not the other way around.
he offers him a smile, nodding toward the other side of the sofa, inviting him to come even closer. let's try that again, shall we. ]
What do I need to do? You want me to switch off my phone? Leave it on the table where you can see it? Maybe take off my hoodie to reassure you no one is listening in?
[dabi waves a hand dismissively at the offer. there's enough liquid in the food he's not going to wind up parched by eating it. though despite sitting at the table, the villain's eyes wander over the three containers. not so much out of wariness--there's still some--but more out of a silent amazement someone would actually take the time to cook something for him. sure, the league occasionally cooked food and served it, but that was generic shit. this was made specifically for him and that... fuck, when's the last time anyone's ever done that? feels like it's been forever; he can barely remember.
whether he cares about itadori staring at his choice of seating arrangement or not, that's up to the kid to decide. all he bothers with is taking the chopsticks and popping them apart before going right for the soba noodles. tofu and sauce he can do later. this is what he wants. as for those internal silent questions, yes. he chooses to sit on the dirty floor instead because he's been living in the scum of society for years now. why the hell should he care if he sits on the floor when he's sat on worse things?
and no, he still doesn't trust him enough to sit down beside itadori while distracted by food.
this kid really doesn't understand at all what it's like living on the other side out here. must be lucky, getting to live that kind of life. skepticism and distance are what have kept dabi alive since he dragged himself off that burning mountain. the sacrifices he's made and the things he's endured aren't something itadori's going to have any way to relate to. trying to make sense of it from that life is impossible. it's not fear (he says) it's self-preservation, fueled by the refusal to die until he gets his revenge.
chopsticks in hand, dabi pops the soba container lid, then the dipping sauce, and... sits silently for several minutes. breathing in the scents wafting from the cold noodles, the pieces of beef, the sauce. it smells good. better than a lot of what he's eaten. even the food they got from the paranormal liberation front has a hard time stacking up to this simply because... well... this was made for him. it's all his. and he hasn't had that in a long, long time.
finally the stupor seems to break and he shoves the chopsticks in. at this point, he would've eaten it with his fingers if he had to. really shouldn't wolf the thing down and he honestly tries to savor it for the first two bites. but... no. greed, hunger, nostalgia, something even worse, dabi shovels it in. it's obvious he was raised with strict manners and decorum at the table, but much of it's been rusted away and laxed from his years on the streets. the core bones, however, still show through.
in that he talks with his mouth full, noodles hanging over his lips or words broken up by a slurp.]
Ya ain't from my world, kid. Don't push me.
[the promise not to attack and acknowledgement of his disadvantage is acceptable enough, but not weighted to the point he'd sidle up to him. still, his intuition doesn't miss the hint itadori drops about their respective abilities, though a quiet nag in his mind suggests he take that admission with the proverbial grain of salt.
he gets halfway through the soba before he bothers testing out the sauce, dipping a noodle into it, then a piece of meat, and quickly loading it into his mouth. the ends of the chopsticks rap on the container in indication and dabi glances up at itadori.]
This is really good.
[it's a sincere compliment despite it's curtness. back to gulping it down. not going at it like a ravenous man afflicted with starvation, but someone who hadn't had a home-cooked meal in years.]
Shoulda had ya phone off before ya even got here. [but there's no helping that now. if anyone's closing in on them, all itadori's done is lead them to a flaming death. another long slurp of noodles and he flinches when he accidentally gets slapped on the cheekbone by it. wipes it off with his shirt because why the hell not.] Thought ya just liked wearing your hoodie up inside.
[ those few minutes of silence were somewhat nerve-racking, in a way itadori isn't sure whether it's a sign of appreciation or further mistrust. he expected an allegation, something as atrocious as poisoning this meal, imagined how matters would escalate beyond repair— while he prepared himself for the worst, he also embraced the possibility of it being something else. longing, nostalgia maybe? dabi had that look on his face.
itadori stayed quiet, allowed the other a moment to dwell in his own reflections. all he did was sulk on his seat, fingers crossed between his knees; staring. his eyes followed each movement, from opening the lid, to the way dabi gorged on his food— all of them came in with a sense of relief, and itadori's shoulders eased, lips curling up. at least that part passed without any issues. he'll take that win. ]
I'm glad you like it. Here ...
[ leaning forward, he picked up the 'extra' pair of chopsticks, which might've suggested itadori planned to share the feast, but he had a change of heart in the last second. the side dish shouldn't be neglected, so he picked a piece of the teriyaki tofu and dropped it on dabi's share; then took another piece for himself; chewing slowly. it's a new dish, but the flavors are on point, might compliment dabi's taste buds, even if he's not a fan of tofu. ]
I'm not pushing. If I was, I'd just show you what you're missing out! I mean ... look!
[ he runs his hand seductively over a ragged cushion, trying to pretend there aren't any dust bunnies stockpiling between his fingers as he speaks- ]
It's sooooo comfy.
[ yes, he gets it. dabi lost faith in all humanity, and any kind gesture is a reason for doubt. the villain will not warm up to him over a silly joke, and he understood it will take proper effort and tolerance to make it work. however, that's the fucking issue. itadori didn't have time to spare. if anything, he's almost certain that man wouldn't entertain this anymore, and this could be it. their last chance.
there's beauty in his raw honesty; this boy lacked the skills to be manipulating— he wore his heart on his sleeves. ]
[ironically it's a silent acknowledgement that itadori's followed through on his promise and dabi still mistrusts him. though at least he seems to find the food offering acceptable enough he no longer thinks there's poison in it. or if he does, no longer cares. still, considering the villain's normal body temperature, perhaps poisons have a harder time working on him. who knows? but there was no further need to accuse him of poisoning or something else.
it's a little strange the guy was over there sulking about the distance between them. is he really so touch starved that he's upset a villainous stranger isn't ready to cozy up to him after only a few minutes of knowing him in person? naive and stupid... but the food is too much a distraction to really chase after that line of thought. a glance up tells him the itadori's relaxed more now, so something's going right.
dabi gives a brief "hm?" as hands reach for the food. noticing the extra pair of utensils doesn't really faze him. itadori said he was making him a meal, not bringing a two-person dinner with him. but he doesn't fight the reach for the food or the dip into the meal. after all, it's itadori's food. and perhaps if things were poisoned, the kid wouldn't be dumb enough to eat it too. so maybe that's a point of note dabi's giving him when itadori munches on some of the tofu.
he quietly picks the piece from his portion and puts it in his mouth alone, chewing on it to test the flavor and texture. well, at least sampling it. he's not full enough to swish it around in his mouth or linger on it like some shit connoisseur. like the rest of the food, it's good. his throat dips with the swallow. tofu isn't his favorite, but he'll take it over plain rice and fish.
back to the soba. if itadori wants any of this, he'd better act soon or forever hold his peace.]
Ya gettin dust in the food.
[won't stop him from eating it, but he does point it out since itadori's got a bunch of dust between his fingers now. might want to be careful or else he'd be outside choking on that dust with nothing to drink either.
humanity might be pushing it, but it's not far from the mark. heroes, kindness, families, feelings, those kinds of things he's lost his faith in. while he's not gunning for spinner's desire to see "true" heroes be brought to light to help society, he's also not on board with shigaraki's desire to destroy everything in the world. then again, dabi simply wants to ruin one man and relish in endeavor's torment. everything else is simply a way to get that done.
but...
the request earns one more look, turquoise gaze searing him like blue flames, and dabi finally shifts to the side, making room for itadori to take a seat.]
Fine. [stubbornness paid out. blame it on the food. treating him like a decent human being.] Bein close's real important to ya or somethin?
[ being 'naive and stupid' is a double-edged sword in their case. itadori could've poisoned the food. he could've been recording their conversation, or allowed the heroes to track his location for a coordinated ambush. he could've been prepared to go against dabi's quirk, with some sort of plan. the truth is— even with how careful dabi is, this could've backfired on him. badly.
a villain, a murderer, a danger to society ... oh, so many reasons for itadori to be anything but tame. dabi is right about questioning it because it didn't make any sense. being touch-starved is not a leading motive, only a mere perk to whatever the fuck is inciting itadori to be here. between all the gibberish chatter in his mind, one word is clear enough to be used as a justification: curiosity.
he pats the dust off his fingers, getting rid of it before he pushed himself off the sofa. a few easy steps brought him closer, and he settles down next to the other. it was hard to bite back to smug pride for getting what he wants— the smile is less innocent and more cocky at this point. it didn't linger, because that question is worth an honest answer. ]
It is important that you realize I'm not here to hurt you. You're too stiff, and if I return that energy, this will be a terrible experience for both of us. One of us needs to relax ... until the other does so too.
[ he nods, confident about the way he interpreted himself. he then turned his attention to what remains of the meal, leaned forward with his arms folded on the table; content with allowing dabi to eat as much as he wants. he'll just grab a burger on the way home. ]
So ... I watched your broadcast earlier.
[ you know what? fuck it. even if he couldn't process his own thoughts, the topic itself is difficult to dismiss. at least itadori recognized they're not meeting up to chat about mundane themes as if they're old friends. there is something itadori wants from him, and he intends to elaborate. he hums, squinting his eyes while idly rubbing the back of his head, ruffling his hair. ]
But ... I'll be honest. It's hard for me to figure out how I feel about it. There are some parts that made me understand your frustration, but not your actions, and other parts ... such as a hero killing a villain ... that part made me think-
[ that's where the broadcast got somewhat personal. he doesn't expect dabi to answer any of the questions that haunted his mind at the time, the ones that made him a bit provoked, but- ]
When is it okay to kill someone? How can we judge someone's death is for the 'greater good'? Or, when they are worth saving?
[he's aware of all those if's and has taken the time and notice to assure himself that itadori's not someone who'd do such a thing. dabi's a perceptive person and he's able to tell things about other people even if he knows them only a short while. some of it's educated assumptions, some survival instinct, some is research and learning. does he know everything itadori is? no. is the guy going to attack him? no.
poison, ambush, fight, none of those things are sitting on the couch across from him. well, excluding whatever this "dangerous to others" ability the kid's hiding. dabi still has no doubts about their clashing worldviews and opinions. itadori's a hero and dabi's a villain. one seeks to protect, the other to destroy. and yet, he's come here with food for him. has to be some merit to that, right? even if it makes no sense.
not expecting his offer to be dismissed, he merely glances to the side when the other guy settles down beside him, making sure to keep some distance between them because he's not about to get chummy with him. dabi returns to the soba, leaving itadori to smile for nothing until he opts to answer the question.]
Uh-huh. [slurp slurp] Had too many betrayals to think otherwise.
[the idea of relaxing around a stranger is basically asking to get a shiv between the ribs or otherwise jumped and back stabbed. despite his lazy and tired appearance, dabi's pretty alert, attentive, and tense. or perhaps his appearance is because of always being on edge. burns aside.
in the end, however, he does slide the container to the side, leaving portion of the soba noodles and sauce for the other guy. dabi silently relocates the container of tofu to the table beside itadori's elbow, then picks a piece with his chopsticks. probably not smart to gorge himself on this kind of delicacy.]
Answer all ya questions?
[he figured he did. itadori might come off as stupid and naive, but dabi isn't sure he's a complete idiot. the movie explained a lot. who dabi was, his background of child abuse under endeavor's hands and the domestic abuse the rest of his family went through from the same man, his father's ambitions and who/what he sacrificed for those, as well as hawks' history and murder. the lies of the heroes and results of their deception and arrogance. throwing the society into a distrusting chaos.]
Thought I made the reasons for my actions pretty fuckin clear.
[exposure, uprooting the false heroes and hollow society to make way for the worthwhile one where there was actual freedom and truth instead of being shackled by lies and abuse. though in dabi's personal case: sadistic revenge.]
You're the hero. You should have answers for those. I don't give a shit bout killin someone.
[ there's a gloomy sigh, and an equally weary expression of pure disappointment in itadori's face when he uttered those words. no, he didn't expect dabi to fulfill those questions for him, considering how he knew nothing about his situation, but for someone who's actively condemning the hero society— he kinda expected some kind of preaching on how they should do their job. then again, dabi probably has no interest in 'fixing' anything, and would rather focus on his own revenge. while bringing everyone down with him.
his father should be held accountable for his part, itadori will never oppose that. killing innocent people, who had nothing to do with dabi's past, is— incredibly irrational and selfish. regardless, to avoid repeating himself, itadori spared him the righteous lecture. dabi knew how he felt about his actions; he knew where the boy stood. if he had to pick a side, it won't be the villains.
half-sulking, he picks another piece of tofu, and with some crafty work— he'd swirl the noodles and a piece of beef into one ball, dipping it in the sauce before he pops it in his mouth. just like that! a subtle way to teach dabi the joys of fusing flavors, or his odd way of feasting. and perhaps an exhibit of his poor manners because he's talking while savoring the bite- ]
I'm sorry about what happened to you as a kid. I won't get into your family affairs, but I simply wanted to let you know I've seen the broadcast. I felt like I was sneaking around earlier. Even when you made it public ...
[ while it is a sensitive topic, it felt cruel not to express his remorse for past events. no child should go through this. dabi didn't deserve any of it. as much as itadori wished he could say it out loud, he had a feeling it will only make dabi be more uncomfortable around him. he held it back, instead conversing about something more lighthearted. ]
I bet it's hard for you to walk into a grocery store, so if you need anything ... use me? I'm a friendly face.
[ yes, he is helping a criminal, but— he's just getting him some food. a guy gotta eat! ]
[dabi wasn't raised with those kinds of notions. burn harder, move faster, get stronger, whatever stands in your way is nothing to you. overcome. surpass. all that matters is being greater than *fill in the blank*. endeavor shoved his ambition down his throat and spread it through his mind until that's all he could think about. destined for greatness. deserving of the attention of his father to make those dreams come true. there was no room for, or even the experience of, softer things like valuing life or the bonds between family members. endeavor ripped out his son's brakes and then abandoned the car.
as for how heroes should do their jobs... psh. simple answer is "don't". there are no true heroes. no hero came to help him, or the rest of his family. they stood by and did nothing. let it all happen. too concerned with their own fame and glittering ranking system to give a shit about the people who needed their help. no, dabi had no interest in "fixing" anything because he didn't care about anything. only what would destroy endeavor even more. which included killing people with endeavor's own flames.
it's just a happy coincidence that he can make use of the league and the plf to forward his own agenda. hell, half the reason he wanted to toss itadori's offer out the proverbial window is because he already knows the guy won't be of any real use to him.
still, since the kid's not giving him any lectures on how he's wrong, dabi's not giving itadori tirades on the corrupt wretchedness of the heroes. it'd ruin the food.
turquoise eyes wander to the side, silently studying how the sorcerer combines the noodles around the tofu and beef piece and coats it in sauce. his chopsticks pause in his mouth during the whole process. tsk... takes a second or so, but he reaches for a piece of tofu and then tries to mimic what itadori just did. it doesn't work as well and he's left scowling at the messy grip of tofu and beef with a noodle dangling from it. not like dabi's one to talk about manners and keeping shut up with one's mouth full.]
So you watched it.
[he opts for the tofu piece, giving up on attempts at combining them. not as skilled as itadori. what really was there to say? the kid saw his past and what happened. but he knows already it won't change the guy's heroic mindset. even if he says he won't get involved, itadori's the kind of person who would jump in between dabi and endeavor and yell at them to stop fighting. just like that stupid deku kid. he cares too much.]
Now ya know everythin.
[picking up the piece of meat, he stuck it in his mouth, only to pause at that hare-brained offer floating out beside him. dabi looks at him, eyes slightly wide from surprise. then narrow a little in suspicion and maybe a tiny trace if wry amusement. use me, he says. the villain slowly draws his chopsticks out and munches on the food a few times before swallowing.]
I got other means of groceries. [especially with the league now running the plf. or what's left of it under all for one. still...] Why don't we keep doin this?
[groceries, dabi can get without a problem. a home cooked meal? not so much.]
I don't know everything. You're more than your past, Dabi.
[ even when his upbringing had a huge influence in shaping him into the man he is today, itadori would like to believe there is more to dabi than pure revenge. he's not a tool, he's a human. there must be days where he just wanted to be himself, unwind, maybe entertain a secret hobby or think about an old friend. maybe think about how his life could've been if his father wasn't blinded with his unrealistic demands. you don't lose your humanity so easy.
it brings itadori back to their phone conversation. 'no one is born evil' — was it? he dwells on it as his eyes follow the way dabi attempted to mimic his craft, only to give up way too soon. in that specific scene, reading into the villain's stoic features, he can't see evil right now. all he can see is someone who got hurt, abandoned, mistreated and someone who loved his father so deeply. itadori has an intimate affair with 'evil'. if he puts dabi and sukuna side by side, they don't look alike. the contrast is: dabi can have a change of heart, while sukuna is incapable of it. why? one is human and one is not.
he takes in a subtle breath, nodding his head and sobering up; back to reality. ]
Okay! I can do that. I'll probably be gone for a bit, but I'll be back next week. Tell me what you wish for me to prepare. Oh, and I'll make sure to bring some drinks next time!
[ he breaks their eye contact, idly examining the kitchen- ... or what he could see from where they're sitting, which isn't much. he ends up unconsciously ruining dabi's personal space by leaning to his side. okay, that stove didn't look like it can function at all. ]
I don't think I could use this kitchen. I kinda wanted to. It would be nice to be able to serve it on the spot, fresh and warm ...
[ in case he wished to have something other than cold soba. speaking of which, he noticed there isn't much left of the food, just enough for itadori to pull his little trick again— but this time, he holds it up for dabi to enjoy. the gesture is clear; he fully expects him to open his mouth and accept it. it's happening. ]
[but oh how much in the wrong direction that goes. he's "more" only in the sense he's experienced things his father would never want him to experience, he's grown stronger than his father (just like endeavor always wanted), he's learned skills dad never would've taught him. and all of it's spiraled right back around into this wreck that applies everything he was and is into the revenge he seeks. all of this in order to destroy the man who killed him. the rest is all burned black.
he's sicced a villain on his own brother and sorely regrets natsuo surviving because what a face it would've put on endeavor if he'd died. he's tried to murder shouto right in front of endeavor. he's killed innocent people simply because he could. there's nothing "human" about that. just want to be himself? hah, that's a joke. there's no one in here. he could only be what endeavor wanted him to be. never had a chance to learn who "touya" was. it's why "dabi" emerged from that burning mountain. touya was too weak to be anyone out from under endeavor's thumb.
might argue the 'born evil' part for a few scant examples, but for the most part, he agrees with it. it's a person's upbringing and their circumstances that affect their choices. touya never grew up thinking he'd be dabi. it was only after that night, alone, hurting, despairing, confused, and abandoned, that everything finally snapped completely. or maybe he snapped earlier, when that little shit shouto, the perfect puppet, was born and he lost everything...
true, he's not an evil spirit, not a being composed of nothing but malicious intent. but a change of heart's no longer possible. he's going to ruin his father and murder him even if it kills him. end of story. something he doubts itadori can even get his head around because of his own upbringing. they think too separately.]
I'm not makin a schedule of this. [there's a difference between making something regular and setting things in stone. with as cautious as dabi is, it should be obvious he wouldn't want someone knowing where he's going to be for any period of time in advance. itadori only got less than 24 hours warning and even that was to a vague location.] I'll call you when I want to meet.
Can ya make this again? [dabi glances at the containers.] Enough for two if ya want to share.
[when itadori leans into him to... look at something, dabi doesn't respond to it. save for rolling his eyes a little and picking up a piece of tofu. but it'll be impossible for itadori not to feel the temperature rise close to his chest and shoulder when he brings himself into dabi's space. the villain runs hot, like there's a fire inside him that won't go out.]
Won't be meeting here. I'll find another place. [something tells him this guy has no idea what keeping a low profile and working covert missions actually entails.] Bring a burner if ya want.
[ignoring the fact dabi's his own burner. he's not letting itadori or anyone use him like that, dammit. might heat up a bath for himself or a pot of water to do some ramen, but fuck acting like people's personal fire--
food.
dabi pauses, one brow furrowing in suspicion and faint annoyance when he finds a hovering spiral of noodle, beef, and tofu floating in front of his face. he glances behind it at that smile and those eyes, understanding full well itadori expects him to open up... tch, this fucking kid...
...
...
tsk, he leans in and opens his mouth, letting him do what he wants. he'll eat it anyways.]
dabi wouldn't have to wait for long, and with a careful touch— he brought the piece closer and inside his mouth, holding still until the other takes the bite, pulling the chopsticks away a second later. a small droplet of the sauce lands on the corner of dabi's mouth, and out of habit, itadori used the tip of his thumb to wipe it clean. it's one of those instants when you act before you think, except in itadori's case— the realization never reached his mind. he genuinely didn't think it was a big deal.
his attention falls on the empty containers now, leaning forward to collect the lids, sealing them shut one by one as he speaks. ]
Ah, okay. Cold soba again, got it. I might try another side dish. If you have a specific request, let me know. Otherwise, I'll choose.
[ the 'bring your own burner' remark is odd, and itadori was so close to point out his fire quirk could be used in something other than burning his victims, but (luckily) he refrained from commenting. it's not illogical to predict dabi is not into that kinda thing. he might find it offensive ... ? somehow.
more importantly, itadori had a very inconstant schedule himself. jujutsu high didn't offer the luxury of a 24-hour cautionary, often ending up being called onto the scene and hearing about what they're dealing with on the way over. he might end up canceling on the villain more than he wishes for, and he's unsure if he should elaborate on his circumstances in advance— or just hope he can pull it off whenever dabi hits him up. okay, there is no point in stressing about this. itadori will deal with it in time.
with everything tucked neatly inside the lunch bag, itadori is free to face the other now, fingers idly drumming on the edge of the table. his gaze drops to the small gap between them, slowly tracing upward until he caught those eyes again. their body language spoke a thousand words; with itadori being more unguarded, and the villain heavy with doubts. while others might feel disheartened by it, itadori is anything but that. ]
Maybe next time you'll relax more ...
[ a lighthearted comment. no pressure, no sense of urgency. dabi is allowed to move at his own pace. ]
[he may be insane, but dabi still manages to have something of a casual personality under that charred exterior. at least it gets him some food. and yeah, the combination of the flavors and textures make that one bite better than all the others. don't call him 'endearing,' ya sap...
he frowns a little at the sudden swipe of a thumb on the edge of his mouth, itadori getting to it before his tongue can. he'll... let him get away with it this time. it's probably a strange feeling on the kid's thumb anyways. the corner of his mouth is where three textures meet: smooth skin of his upper lip, hard metal of a staple, and tough wrinkle of the burn scar. dabi turns his head away and focuses on chewing the piece so he wouldn't have to think about the touch. itador's free to do whatever he wants in the meantime.
each container snapping shut sounds a little too loud in the quiet area, a reminder the time is over and the meal is done. well, meal yes. he's pretty sure he can easily get itadori to stay simply by doing whatever outside of attacking him or leaving. hell, the former might get him to stay for some crazy reason. protection or defense or that whole trying to reach out to him weirdness.]
No fish, no plain rice.
[anything else asides from that, he'll eat. while he'd focus more on survival than being picky, the those two in particular make him want to throw up. so there's no point in even trying to force them down his throat. there are some... bad memories associated with the taste and smell.
luckily for itadori, dabi won't take any break off of any potential set meeting as an insult. he's aware the guy has his own things going on (some day he's going to find out what) and since he refuses to give itadori more than a few hours of direct heads up, he can't expect him to be ready to go every time. it'll be hit or miss and neither of them will be tied down to the other. just the way dabi prefers it: no strings attached. besides, spontaneous meetings mean there's little way itadori can prepare anything too complex. dabi doesn't want him wasting a lot of effort on him.
attention's turned on him once again and dabi eyes him form the corner of his gaze. he's still wary, never lost the doubts about itadori's intentions. but they're sitting together, here, close, so apparently some of those guarded notions have abated or at least been lowered. the idea of relaxing around him is somewhat laughable... but also something a small flicker in his mind kind of wants to experience. he's comfortable enough around the league to actually sleep with them in the same or nearby rooms, and that says something.
but between them?]
Think ya made your intentions clear. [however, it's dabi who leans forward slightly this time, enough that faint ghost of warmth from a hot body brushes at the edge of itadori's skin. turquoise eyes meet amber, holding them without hesitation.] What do ya want from me?
[ he already knew of dabi's hatred for fish, but plain rice is a valuable input— since he was already considering creating a dish including it. nothing to worry about, itadori is well off in the kitchen, and an idea will come up. he aims to impress.
with one hand holding into the band of his lunch bag, with the plan of freeing dabi from the chains of keeping his guard up around him, itadori froze just in time to hear that question. the focus on 'me' is hard to dismiss, along with the way that man got close enough to, finally, notice the inhuman warmth coming off of that body. it made him wonder if he should be threatened but chose to believe it wasn't deliberate.
back to the question— itadori always seemed to have some kind of edge in the way he regards others, eyes naturally intense. this time it was different. it's an odd thought, but he was more at ease with taking the lead this entire night. for him to approach dabi first, for him to be the one to demand acceptance, for him to reach for a touch— now it felt dabi is taking it away from him. being caught off guard a bit.
interesting. itadori never thought he would care about that. ]
I guess I wish to start ... questioning if an authority figure is always right.
[ it started with 'I don't know why I'm seeking him', but the more he indulged in a conversation with that man, it made itadori define why he found him so unique. well, perhaps dabi is not that special. every villain probably had a similar mindset, along with the rebels and those who are unmindful of the rules. not that itadori is seeking that extreme, he is still committed to doing what is expected of him. he'd save as many people he can. his loyalty will forever be to those he cares about. but-
why must he accept the fate they imposed on him? why is he deemed unworthy of saving? why isn't there an open discussion to find alternative solutions that didn't result in him being executed? he is a good person. he is doing his best.
is he allowed to ask to live?
he searched the other man's eyes, still frozen, and then slowly let go of the bag; hands dropping on each knee. ]
Also, you're an appealing distraction. It feels kinda dirty, but I've been honest in our phone call. No one talks to strangers unless they seek some sort of escape.
[ a pause, he then frowns and shifts his gaze to the side; embarrassed with wording it this way. ]
I want to be your friend. I like you, but ... how long can we keep the peace? We'll clash at some point, right?
[it's not that he hates rice. season it. fry it. flavor it. just don't serve it plain. the scent and taste make him nauseous. pavlovian response. it's ironic that this kid's some kind of cook along with the rest of the stuff he does. then again, plenty of those u.a. kids are multi-talented.
the heat of his body isn't deliberate; that's simply how his temperature runs due to his quirk. but if itadori wants to take it as a threat, dabi's not about to try and change his mind. he's never pretended to be anything but dangerous and guarded. itadori's been the one to instigate everything, from the conversation to the offer to reach out to the food prep to even sitting beside him. it's probably the first time dabi's voluntarily responded to that lead with an actual request with himself as the offering party.
take a bit of that initiative back for himself, rather than sitting here as the reactor. the answer he gets, however, earns a wry expression. interesting topic but it's not like he's been much a voice for accepting what the authority in his life says. he's even encouraged itadori to consider his own figures above him and whether or not what they say is true, or merely something they want him to believe.]
I ain't gonna stop ya from doing that. Feel free to tell me once ya find out someone's leadin ya around.
[because he'll never trust someone with that kind of power or position. as far as dabi's concerned, they're all corrupt and untrustworthy. does he trust itadori? not really. on the surface, he can admit the kid's here for curiosity and perhaps some misguided attempt to understand and/or "help" him, even if he tries to disguise it under the name of "friendship" spawning between them. still...
it's a strange combination. dabi hasn't accepted his fate in one way, and yet has done exactly that in another. his salvation was forfeit long ago in exchange for his revenge and he'll viciously cling to the latter with no hope of the former because it's impossible for the two to coexist within his life. as for alternatives... well... blame society on that. (though he'd laugh if itadori ever called him a "good person" aloud.)
as the bag settles and things seem to shift from an imminent departure to a stay of leave, dabi continues regarding itadori's expression and face, nothing broken or open on his own. he remains as steely and enigmatic as ever.]
Oh yeah?
[he remembers the phone call, what itadori said in it, what he wanted. so that's still hanging around, huh. interesting. appealing and dirty aren't exactly bad ways to describe the distraction dabi is. a little bit flattering, in the sarcastic admittance. a sort of escape from itadori's normal life. that's entirely possible and he might actually be okay with it.]
Ya barely know me outside of that phone call and my video, but ya say you wanna be my friend and you like me. Sounds kinda desperate and shallow, kid. Not that I mind.
[as for the other part, dabi merely scoffs. peace versus battle between them is an easy answer.]
Don't get in my way and we won't.
[itadori knows now what he wants to do. so long as he doesn't interfere with that, dabi won't have much reason to attack him. it's not like he'll go out of his way to bother the kid either; he doesn't need whatever he's got going on interfering with his plans.]
As for that other thing... there's a bed in the other room.
It's not desperate and shallow. It's not! It's- ...
[ -hard to unfold. itadori had some really good friends; he's not the type to struggle with creating new alliances everywhere he goes. he's not 'alone' in that aspect. it's a lot deeper than that. it might have to do with the fact dabi is oblivious to who he truly is somehow created a sense of escape? god, he didn't know anymore. it was too draining to narrow it down.
he offers the villain a flat stare. ah, don't get in the way, and we won't have a problem— yeah, that's the uncomplicated theory of it. it still felt bothersome to be told not to react, in any given situation. chances of them crossing paths in the field are slim, true, but ... don't kill someone in front of him, you! which reminds him, he needs to come up with a scheme against those flames. you know, just in case!
the bed comment barely triggered any reaction. at first! itadori ends up following dabi's gesture, glancing toward the bedroom door, blinking, staring— it hasn't reached his brain yet. aaaaany second now.
3
2
1 ... ]
Oi!
[ yup, it's here. despite the burn in his cheeks, itadori reassured himself that man simply had a weird, lewd sense of humor. if he wished to hang out with him more, he should get used to it and not take it to heart. a sigh followed, somewhat striving to be dismissive, while still keeping his eyes on dabi. it reflects on a subtle inner struggle; swinging from being tempted to rejecting the idea. either way, the sorcerer is not hating it. he really isn't used to someone being this forward with him. ]
... You didn't even want to sit next to me a minute ago, and now you're acting like everything is okay. What's wrong with you?
[ for once, this is where dabi should be wary of him. there is no need in repeating his concerns, he trusts that man is smart enough to remember the warning during their previous phone conversation. which brings him back to the hypothesis of it being a mere joke. straightening his back, itadori parodied a serious, contemplating expression— arms folded against his chest. ]
Is this really your way of asking someone to have sex? Aren't you supposed to be smooth and charming? No flirting or sweet talk?
[ he tilts his head to the side, taking it more seriously now. ]
If things turn bad, will you still agree to meet me?
[he doesn't attempt to counter the protest, instead finding some amusement in itadori's attempts to shove away the comment. someone who'd reach out to a random stranger and repeatedly fight for the chance to form a bond and make a friend. even after learning those horrible things about dabi, he still wants to claim attempts at friendship. it sounds so desperate. stubborn. shallow. friendship requires trust and trust takes far more time and experience than this. but itadori thinks it can come simply out of a sheer stubborn will and proclaiming it so. kind of mind-boggling in its naivety.
and a little interesting to watch him struggle with it.
dabi has no doubts they could cross antagonistic paths. and yet, it sounds so easy to avoid doing so. the kid's already hinted about not being involved with the heroes and villains running around the society. but the secret "thing" itadori is involved with instead, the heroic nature the kid holds close to his chest, those things could very well cause friction between them if crossed. and dabi has no idea what that "thing" is. stepping on an unknown landmine trigger that makes "not my problem" turn into "getting involved" in a few seconds flat.
mah, well... he doubts he'll ever kill someone in front of itadori if this is what their interactions are going to be.
oh? no reaction? and here he thought he'd break into the flustered protests he'd been privy to on the phon-- ... never mind. the corner of his mouth quirks up in the bastard child of sneer and smirk as itadori's face blooms crimson. took a bit, but it hit. a lewd sense of humor? hardly. it's simply something the kid had brought up before and dabi found intriguing enough to needle him with. taunting people comes easy to him. doesn't believe the dismissive exhale, but he lets him get away with ducking the issue. mostly because he knows itadori's going to be thinking of it for a while.]
Oy, oy. Nothin's "wrong" with me. [the way he says it, however, implies he's well aware the opposite is very much true. there's so much "wrong" with him according to the society in which they live.] Hn, weren't ya the one who said you wanted to try it?
[towards the end of the phone call. oh he's wary of itadori. never once has he relaxes his internal guard around the kid. food and company albeit, he's still a potential threat. yeah, dabi remembers what he said about a quirk-like ability running out of control if he gets distracted enough. but he also figured itadori's a fighter. and if you can fight and still keep in control, sex can operate very similarly. besides, this kid's certainly jerked off before and no one's died from it. right?
dabi leans back to his previous perch by the table, regarding the other guy's cross-armed stance as much a bluff as it obviously is.]
This ain't that kinda porno, kid. [while he certainly can be charming and smooth, he has to want to be. and 99/100, he's not with someone he wants to be that with.] Ya think I'll dump ya cause you're bad at sex?
[the villain's eyes shift towards him, head tilting to give him a look that's curious, predatory, threatening, and intrigued. there's no fear anywhere.]
Everyone wants to try it at some point. It's human nature ...
[ fun fact: he stopped jerking off the second he started sharing a body with something as taunting as sukuna. the never-ending jokes and bullying he will endure if he allowed that curse to witness such an intimate moment. in his mind, it was different if he's experiencing it with someone. less shameful? regardless, it's not like itadori is self-conscious about it. it's more of him finding it difficult to have a boner knowing his audience is sukuna. yup.
itadori squints, groaning afterward as he muttered 'stop calling me a kid' under his breath; finding it condescending. as for being terrible in bed? well, duh. he'll own up to it. he has never done it before, zero experience outside of what you see in the movies, and pretending to be a sex expert is not an option. itadori wouldn't start such rumors. if dabi is expecting a mind-blowing orgasm, that won't happen. which begs the question — why is the villain entertaining this? not only the offer is bad sex; it's also potential risk. how is that erotic in any way?
their chitchat grasps an abrupt turn, taken back by those words. his expression slipped a little on the edges, lips pressed together. this could be the first time itadori is genuinely provoked. his hand settled on the coffee table again, tapping the tip of his index finger against the wooden surface; it's hasty at first, and it slows down as his mind centered on an answer. or, in this case, another question. ]
Are you really open to this?
[ what's the point of a debate if this is nothing more than a joke. itadori can't tell between honest curiosity or teasing when it comes to that man. it's pointless to express himself if it is not taken to heart, hence he didn't bother. the displeasure on his face is unwavering, flexing his fingers, so they can cradle his cheek as he rests his head, elbow propped in support. ]
Besides, you give a vibe of someone who's selfish in bed. Am I wrong?
[ would dabi really go slow with a first timer? allow itadori the chance to explore what felt good and what didn't? is he going to be gentle or rush? it requires patience he's pretty sure dabi will refuse to offer. attraction aside, which the villain is really enticing, in spite of those scars— that's not enough to make it a good experience. ]
You don't even trust me with a kiss. Would you even allow me to touch you? Brush my fingers over your throat ...
[ what? it could happen unintentionally. in the heat of the moment. ]
[he can't deny it. growing up led to some experimenting as well. before his untimely "death" and all. then those childhood experiments went straight into the darkness, turning into another tool for survival, manipulation, or killing boredom. dabi's still completely in the dark regarding itadori's hangups about sex, though he's wondering if it's something like shigaraki's. before his "leader" managed to get more control of his quirk, if all five of his fingers touched something, the decay would start. not a fun thing to deal with when having sex. considering itadori hasn't fucked anything up from touch yet, dabi's guessing it's something else. maybe internal? concentration? remote?
tough shit. still calling him a "kid" because he is. though he might graduate to "guy" after another meeting or two. doesn't help that itadori's the same age as those u.a. kids dabi's contended with a few times already. that said, doesn't look like the other guy's (see?) going to defend himself against the suggested accusation he's gonna be bad in bed. of course he is; he's probably dealing with a fucking virgin over here. who may or may not touch himself at night. psh, still a "kid", greenhorn.
so no, he's not expecting any mind-blowing sex or even remotely good sex. hell... it's sex. he's had good, bad, painful, risky, boring, weird, dangerous sex before. itadori's not going to show him anything different. there's nothing "erotic" or "romantic" about it. sex is an action, feels good (most of the time), and best of all, for a little while during, you stop fucking thinking. about anything. that makes it addictive.
itadori goes serious and dabi knows he's struck a nerve. that's fucking rich. talk of villainy and death gets a smile and dodge, but bring up sex and suddenly there's a problem. priorities, itadori. so he provoked him. good. about time he lost that eternal smile.]
Second time I've brought it up to ya. Don't care if ya say yes or no. Won't matter to me in the end.
[one, it's not a joke. he's offering. two, it's not serious. despite the illogical contradiction, dabi's shown more caution to someone cooking for him and sitting behind him talking friendship than he's showing the offer of fucking. or, it could very well be itadori's proven himself at least somewhat trustworthy. enough to toss this on the proverbial table.
the answer he gets, in the form of some questions, however, earns a brief crack of a grin at the side of his mouth. quick, sarcastic, and amused, but it's not a negative response. so that's what he's worried about? granted, dabi can be extremely selfish in bed. take what he wants and leave as soon as he's done, screw what his partner feels about it. but that's a choice, not a practice.
he settles his jaw on his hand, elbow propped on the table as he regards yuji with a curious gaze.]
Why dontcha try to kiss me now?
[there's a brief flicker of blue flame of the side of his lips. itadori mentioned dabi doesn't trust him, but the villain's using that little flash of his quirk to suggest itadori doesn't trust him either. though he's welcome to prove him wrong...]
If I'm selfish, it's cause I wanna be.
[turquoise eyes narrow at him, taking a slightly more serious tone to that notion of fingers on his throat.] So long as ya don't try to kill me... [he lets that hover as the main stipulation. if it's just sex, it's just sex.]
[ if dabi thought he got annoyed because they are discussing sex in general, and not the fact he's downgrading what other victims have been through because of sukuna's short moments of freedom— then he's mistaken. itadori didn't like how the villain is making a mockery over his own, personal anxieties. then again, dabi is blinded. an excuse not to feed the kindle of resentment that is growing from within. however, he can tell dabi is the type of crazy who would mock it even if he knew what he's dealing with. he's the type to die with a smirk on his face, isn't he?
at this point, itadori is certain words won't reach him. they will end up going back and forth, even when he expressed that he's not keen on the idea. dabi going as far as taunting him for a kiss is— shocking. but, what urged itadori's breath to stutter is the bold offer to make him take the lead. him? this virgin who never been touched before? get on top and fucking lead?
for real?
it's pretty evident dabi is looking at him as this desperate kid waiting to get his dick sucked. it's just insulting in so many ways. did he expect him to roll on his back and start wagging his tail happily? itadori didn't even notice the way he chewed on his lower lip, fingers curling into tight fists, for a brief moment, before flexing again. ]
You're used to taking advantage of people and have people treat you the same. That's why I don't think you'd object if I asked for it from our first conversation. I didn't need to make you the meal you wanted. Or, try to reassure you that I don't want to be your enemy. I'd be straightforward, get what I want, and never speak to you again. And you wouldn't mind. That's how you like it.
[ despite his words, itadori kept an easy tone. it was not deliberate to make it sound so intimate, but it was how he felt about the whole thing. truth is, he wouldn't mind a kiss. it's a soft display of goodwill, one that's not exclusive to romantic couples— or that's what itadori conceived. every time he gets a sense of being closer to that man, warm up to him, the sorcerer gets burned and pushed back again. dabi just knew how to get to him, without him fucking knowing anything about his situation.
it's terrifying— the thought of what he could do if he did. it's probably why sukuna is feeding on his toxic energy. what a show, indeed. ]
Fine, I'll kiss you.
[ there's a pause, he then grabbed the bag and pushed himself up to his feet. he stares the other down before he shrugged his shoulders. ]
I'll even fuck you. Since you gave me permission to try it out on you, right? Since you're cocky and stupidly confident, you'll be fine. I'll do it all ... when you stop acting like an asshole.
[ it can't be that hard. ]
You can do it. I've just seen it. A few moments ago. You were thankful for the homemade meal, right?
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no subject
Date: 8/21/21 20:51 (UTC)[ after all, sorcerers operate during the night. it was a lot easier to keep their activities within the rules of confidentiality when the streets are less populated; no one gets hurt in the process, and fewer questions to answer to. so, itadori is used to it. no one questioned where he's off to, and if they did, he'd tell them he's meeting with a new friend. which might not be the truth anymore, as he didn't understand how to label that man anymore.
he likes to believe this night will be different. while dabi had done his research with little success, itadori was lucky with his own. the infamous broadcast was the first hit he got as soon as he typed dabi's name, leading him straight to the video, and like the rest of the civilians, and the todoroki family, he was overwhelmed with everything. it was a lot to take in, yet it made perfect sense, matching every subtle hint dabi dropped during their first conversation and the depth of his scars. while the intention is to bring down Endeavor's creditability, exposing the hypocrisy of the hero society, itadori couldn't help but to feel— a burning displeasure by the end of it.
the question is: who is it directed at? he didn't know.
he finally reached the abandoned park, quick to acknowledge why dabi picked this location. dressed in a casual gray hoodie, black pants, and sneakers— he wasn't out to impress. the promised meal is not forgotten, as itadori would be seen holding into what appears to be a mid-sized lunch bag? yes, it screamed 'high schooler', but it kept all the containers neatly tucked in. no complaints are allowed.
that's when he pulled out his phone again, quickly typing- ]
I'm here.
no subject
Date: 8/21/21 23:28 (UTC)though he has no real evidence to this, itadori sounded more naive and inexperienced than stupid. meaning dabi has suspicion that as much as he's looking into the kid and researching him to find out what he's up to and who he is, there's a high chance itadori has done the exact same thing. and considering dabi's tell-all video condemning endeavor and the hero society by exposing several of their lies, abuses, and crimes, is widely available on the net and other media, it's impossible for itadori to miss it if he tries to research it. so he'll know all who dabi is, his real name, his family, some of the reason behind his scars, his goals, his opinions, so much of himself exposed in that video to the world.
should be interesting to see what he thinks out. both about dabi and the hero society. perhaps it'll make the kid look at whatever his own organization or area is and think about things more. any truths he's been blindly accepting, the images of the higher ranks in his world, whether or not he's actually thinking for himself or simply going along with a flow he has no true understanding of. if it strips him of some of that naivety and innocence, all the better.
but can he really still say he wants to be friends with a known mass murderer who has zero intention of stopping his villainy and every intention of murdering his own family members to torture and bring down his father? in that respect, dabi remains even more wary of itadori. after all, the kid said he'd get involved it meant protecting the people he cared for, and "all of society" is likely going to catch at least one of those in the proverbial shotgun blast.
he gets the text message and moves. walking around the rim of the water tower overlooking the park. turquoise eyes scan over the trees, around the perimeter of the abandoned area, searching for cars or bodies or any other potential sign of a trap, ambush, or double cross. seeing none, he retreats.
it'll be another several minutes before footsteps sound behind itadori to the side and dabi steps halfway into the moonlight, most of his upper half still covered in shadow from the trees.]
Didn't think ya'd show.
no subject
Date: 8/22/21 14:26 (UTC)despite it all, he's still here. he's still seeking dabi. why? ... why, indeed.
within his conflicts, this whole fling served sukuna in one way or another. sharing a body meant sharing a mind, sharing a soul; he can hear itadori's doubts and if that young villain managed to fuck with his head some more, it will humor an extremely bored vengeful spirit who had nothing else to do but to lend an ear, and wait in his lonely domain. dabi has a unique audience now.
he glanced toward that familiar voice, picking up on the distance between them. ah, guarded as always. ]
I had my doubts. Not gonna lie. But ... I made a promise.
[ he holds up the lunch bag, somewhat beckoning on how heavy it is. a sign of real effort from this end. itadori stood where he is, presuming dabi would lead the way into a more private area. unless he wished to have dinner under this tree? not that he minds. ]
I hope you're hungry!
no subject
Date: 8/22/21 17:03 (UTC)it's one of the reasons he's still keeping his distance, eyes watching the other guy from the shadows smothering his upper half. dabi has no idea about the things going on inside itadori's body and mind, but he's only somewhat convinced the kid doesn't secretly have a camera or a sniper rifle aimed at him from some unknown location. which is why, when he lifts up that lunch bag, dabi finally emerges from the gloom.
looks like this shit really checks out... why the hell does this guy care so much?]
Ya might really be crazy. [for a second, the fight or flight response wanders across his mind. but dabi finally lifts his hand and motions itadori to follow him.] This way.
[and heads off. it's not a long walk, but it is a silent one. on dabi's part at least. up to the point of arriving at a cabin-like structure. it's not dilapidated, but it's obviously abandoned. one window broken in and the door isn't locked from how the villain simply pushes it open and walks in. furnished at least. a table and a couch in the living room, small cabinets in a small kitcken, a bed and bath in the room beyond.]
So whaddya really doin this for?
no subject
Date: 8/22/21 18:22 (UTC)itadori made no attempt to break the silence, often distracted by inspecting the area around him; keeping an eye on any odd activities, noises and it wouldn't hurt to pinpoint escape routes if the situation begs for it. after all, dabi had a troublesome quirk: fire. it wasn't a long walk, true, but he still had enough time to stare at the other man's back, watching as a small breeze brush through his hair, the way he walked— the small details. ]
I don't know ...
[ he didn't even miss a beat with dropping that confession. the kitchen didn't appeal to him for some reason, opting to walk into the living room and settle the bag on the coffee table; waiting for the other to follow. he then flopped down on the sofa, patting away at the accumulated dust on the shabby cushions. he shrugged, clearing his throat before he continued. ]
I'm simply interested in you. You equally piss me off and calm me down.
[ without waiting for an approval, he begins to set up the table; taking out a couple of sealed plastic containers and arranging them. the cooked cold soba noodles with garnish/beef in one, dipping sauce in another, and a side dish of teriyaki tofu. chopsticks will be found wrapped up in a clean napkin, but— no drinks. that's the only thing itadori couldn't bring along.
finally, after what seemed in forever, under the poor glints in this cabin ... he meets dabi's eyes. that's when he realized he was, subconsciously, avoiding them. ]
Can you come closer now?
[ unless the villain is still wary of him ... ]
no subject
Date: 8/22/21 20:27 (UTC)"i don't know." that's an expected answer. dabi hangs out by one of the walls, standing his ground with his arms by his sides, eyes resting on itadori without any intense focus. but he is watching him, letting his mind wander with the questions. did he really think this kid would have an answer? not really. never seemed like he did earlier. but it's strange for a fling to hang around with this much interest...]
I've heard the first one before. No one's ever said the second. [he calms him down? how the hell is that supposed to work? the kid still doesn't know him beyond facts and a phone call. who's calmed down by a random stranger? fits in with itadori's oddness at least. as for being interested in him, well... that's been something he's experienced already. the reason for "why" the interest usually changes.
all said, dabi's silently surprised and curious about the containers. so much of it. he didn't simply leave everything in one container and that was it. hmph... actually treating it with care. and by proxy, him. that's a fucking new. when's the last time someone outside the league treated him like a damn human being? for that reason alone, some of the villain's hackles lower. slightly. won't even bitch about the lack of a drink. he can handle without one easily enough. there's a lake out there if he really needs something.
still wary, yes, but... he can't very well eat from way over here. dabi rolls off the wall and heads over. eyeing him, but at least he does approach... and finally takes a seat on the floor on the opposite side of the coffee table.]
Ya made all this?
no subject
Date: 8/23/21 14:37 (UTC)[ his voice dulls into a hushed mutter, staring at the way dabi settled on the floor; eyes wide open. dumbfounded, he glanced at the empty space on the sofa, reassuring himself there is plenty of room to accommodate another individual, and then he returns regarding dabi again— who chose to sit on the dirty floor instead. that was a better option in his mind over joining itadori? was it that bad? did he hold that level of skepticism towards anyone new coming into his life? to carry such heavy fears— must be exhausting.
slowly, he offers the villain his chopsticks— holding it out and waiting for him to accept it. yeah, he could've allowed dabi to pick them up on his own, but there's an urge to break this cold reserve between them. something as subtle as an accidental touch between their fingers could help ease the tension. or, that's what he hoped for. ]
You don't have to sit on the floor, you know. I have no reason to attack you. If anything, I'm at a disadvantage in this small cabin.
[ here's a hint. a remark on dabi's quirk. while itadori didn't necessarily fear such a power, which might be part of being as simple-minded as he is, he still understood it's not a smart move to start shit when he's surrounded by wooden walls, cornered, and with no chance to escape. he should be the one on edge, not the other way around.
he offers him a smile, nodding toward the other side of the sofa, inviting him to come even closer. let's try that again, shall we. ]
What do I need to do? You want me to switch off my phone? Leave it on the table where you can see it? Maybe take off my hoodie to reassure you no one is listening in?
[ he'd do it all, honestly. ]
no subject
Date: 8/23/21 23:07 (UTC)[dabi waves a hand dismissively at the offer. there's enough liquid in the food he's not going to wind up parched by eating it. though despite sitting at the table, the villain's eyes wander over the three containers. not so much out of wariness--there's still some--but more out of a silent amazement someone would actually take the time to cook something for him. sure, the league occasionally cooked food and served it, but that was generic shit. this was made specifically for him and that... fuck, when's the last time anyone's ever done that? feels like it's been forever; he can barely remember.
whether he cares about itadori staring at his choice of seating arrangement or not, that's up to the kid to decide. all he bothers with is taking the chopsticks and popping them apart before going right for the soba noodles. tofu and sauce he can do later. this is what he wants. as for those internal silent questions, yes. he chooses to sit on the dirty floor instead because he's been living in the scum of society for years now. why the hell should he care if he sits on the floor when he's sat on worse things?
and no, he still doesn't trust him enough to sit down beside itadori while distracted by food.
this kid really doesn't understand at all what it's like living on the other side out here. must be lucky, getting to live that kind of life. skepticism and distance are what have kept dabi alive since he dragged himself off that burning mountain. the sacrifices he's made and the things he's endured aren't something itadori's going to have any way to relate to. trying to make sense of it from that life is impossible. it's not fear (he says) it's self-preservation, fueled by the refusal to die until he gets his revenge.
chopsticks in hand, dabi pops the soba container lid, then the dipping sauce, and... sits silently for several minutes. breathing in the scents wafting from the cold noodles, the pieces of beef, the sauce. it smells good. better than a lot of what he's eaten. even the food they got from the paranormal liberation front has a hard time stacking up to this simply because... well... this was made for him. it's all his. and he hasn't had that in a long, long time.
finally the stupor seems to break and he shoves the chopsticks in. at this point, he would've eaten it with his fingers if he had to. really shouldn't wolf the thing down and he honestly tries to savor it for the first two bites. but... no. greed, hunger, nostalgia, something even worse, dabi shovels it in. it's obvious he was raised with strict manners and decorum at the table, but much of it's been rusted away and laxed from his years on the streets. the core bones, however, still show through.
in that he talks with his mouth full, noodles hanging over his lips or words broken up by a slurp.]
Ya ain't from my world, kid. Don't push me.
[the promise not to attack and acknowledgement of his disadvantage is acceptable enough, but not weighted to the point he'd sidle up to him. still, his intuition doesn't miss the hint itadori drops about their respective abilities, though a quiet nag in his mind suggests he take that admission with the proverbial grain of salt.
he gets halfway through the soba before he bothers testing out the sauce, dipping a noodle into it, then a piece of meat, and quickly loading it into his mouth. the ends of the chopsticks rap on the container in indication and dabi glances up at itadori.]
This is really good.
[it's a sincere compliment despite it's curtness. back to gulping it down. not going at it like a ravenous man afflicted with starvation, but someone who hadn't had a home-cooked meal in years.]
Shoulda had ya phone off before ya even got here. [but there's no helping that now. if anyone's closing in on them, all itadori's done is lead them to a flaming death. another long slurp of noodles and he flinches when he accidentally gets slapped on the cheekbone by it. wipes it off with his shirt because why the hell not.] Thought ya just liked wearing your hoodie up inside.
[like a weirdo.]
no subject
Date: 8/24/21 21:47 (UTC)itadori stayed quiet, allowed the other a moment to dwell in his own reflections. all he did was sulk on his seat, fingers crossed between his knees; staring. his eyes followed each movement, from opening the lid, to the way dabi gorged on his food— all of them came in with a sense of relief, and itadori's shoulders eased, lips curling up. at least that part passed without any issues. he'll take that win. ]
I'm glad you like it. Here ...
[ leaning forward, he picked up the 'extra' pair of chopsticks, which might've suggested itadori planned to share the feast, but he had a change of heart in the last second. the side dish shouldn't be neglected, so he picked a piece of the teriyaki tofu and dropped it on dabi's share; then took another piece for himself; chewing slowly. it's a new dish, but the flavors are on point, might compliment dabi's taste buds, even if he's not a fan of tofu. ]
I'm not pushing. If I was, I'd just show you what you're missing out! I mean ... look!
[ he runs his hand seductively over a ragged cushion, trying to pretend there aren't any dust bunnies stockpiling between his fingers as he speaks- ]
It's sooooo comfy.
[ yes, he gets it. dabi lost faith in all humanity, and any kind gesture is a reason for doubt. the villain will not warm up to him over a silly joke, and he understood it will take proper effort and tolerance to make it work. however, that's the fucking issue. itadori didn't have time to spare. if anything, he's almost certain that man wouldn't entertain this anymore, and this could be it. their last chance.
there's beauty in his raw honesty; this boy lacked the skills to be manipulating— he wore his heart on his sleeves. ]
Can I sit next to you, then?
[ he is stubborn, too. ]
no subject
Date: 8/24/21 22:21 (UTC)it's a little strange the guy was over there sulking about the distance between them. is he really so touch starved that he's upset a villainous stranger isn't ready to cozy up to him after only a few minutes of knowing him in person? naive and stupid... but the food is too much a distraction to really chase after that line of thought. a glance up tells him the itadori's relaxed more now, so something's going right.
dabi gives a brief "hm?" as hands reach for the food. noticing the extra pair of utensils doesn't really faze him. itadori said he was making him a meal, not bringing a two-person dinner with him. but he doesn't fight the reach for the food or the dip into the meal. after all, it's itadori's food. and perhaps if things were poisoned, the kid wouldn't be dumb enough to eat it too. so maybe that's a point of note dabi's giving him when itadori munches on some of the tofu.
he quietly picks the piece from his portion and puts it in his mouth alone, chewing on it to test the flavor and texture. well, at least sampling it. he's not full enough to swish it around in his mouth or linger on it like some shit connoisseur. like the rest of the food, it's good. his throat dips with the swallow. tofu isn't his favorite, but he'll take it over plain rice and fish.
back to the soba. if itadori wants any of this, he'd better act soon or forever hold his peace.]
Ya gettin dust in the food.
[won't stop him from eating it, but he does point it out since itadori's got a bunch of dust between his fingers now. might want to be careful or else he'd be outside choking on that dust with nothing to drink either.
humanity might be pushing it, but it's not far from the mark. heroes, kindness, families, feelings, those kinds of things he's lost his faith in. while he's not gunning for spinner's desire to see "true" heroes be brought to light to help society, he's also not on board with shigaraki's desire to destroy everything in the world. then again, dabi simply wants to ruin one man and relish in endeavor's torment. everything else is simply a way to get that done.
but...
the request earns one more look, turquoise gaze searing him like blue flames, and dabi finally shifts to the side, making room for itadori to take a seat.]
Fine. [stubbornness paid out. blame it on the food. treating him like a decent human being.] Bein close's real important to ya or somethin?
no subject
Date: 8/25/21 19:48 (UTC)a villain, a murderer, a danger to society ... oh, so many reasons for itadori to be anything but tame. dabi is right about questioning it because it didn't make any sense. being touch-starved is not a leading motive, only a mere perk to whatever the fuck is inciting itadori to be here. between all the gibberish chatter in his mind, one word is clear enough to be used as a justification: curiosity.
he pats the dust off his fingers, getting rid of it before he pushed himself off the sofa. a few easy steps brought him closer, and he settles down next to the other. it was hard to bite back to smug pride for getting what he wants— the smile is less innocent and more cocky at this point. it didn't linger, because that question is worth an honest answer. ]
It is important that you realize I'm not here to hurt you. You're too stiff, and if I return that energy, this will be a terrible experience for both of us. One of us needs to relax ... until the other does so too.
[ he nods, confident about the way he interpreted himself. he then turned his attention to what remains of the meal, leaned forward with his arms folded on the table; content with allowing dabi to eat as much as he wants. he'll just grab a burger on the way home. ]
So ... I watched your broadcast earlier.
[ you know what? fuck it. even if he couldn't process his own thoughts, the topic itself is difficult to dismiss. at least itadori recognized they're not meeting up to chat about mundane themes as if they're old friends. there is something itadori wants from him, and he intends to elaborate. he hums, squinting his eyes while idly rubbing the back of his head, ruffling his hair. ]
But ... I'll be honest. It's hard for me to figure out how I feel about it. There are some parts that made me understand your frustration, but not your actions, and other parts ... such as a hero killing a villain ... that part made me think-
[ that's where the broadcast got somewhat personal. he doesn't expect dabi to answer any of the questions that haunted his mind at the time, the ones that made him a bit provoked, but- ]
When is it okay to kill someone? How can we judge someone's death is for the 'greater good'? Or, when they are worth saving?
no subject
Date: 8/25/21 22:24 (UTC)poison, ambush, fight, none of those things are sitting on the couch across from him. well, excluding whatever this "dangerous to others" ability the kid's hiding. dabi still has no doubts about their clashing worldviews and opinions. itadori's a hero and dabi's a villain. one seeks to protect, the other to destroy. and yet, he's come here with food for him. has to be some merit to that, right? even if it makes no sense.
not expecting his offer to be dismissed, he merely glances to the side when the other guy settles down beside him, making sure to keep some distance between them because he's not about to get chummy with him. dabi returns to the soba, leaving itadori to smile for nothing until he opts to answer the question.]
Uh-huh. [slurp slurp] Had too many betrayals to think otherwise.
[the idea of relaxing around a stranger is basically asking to get a shiv between the ribs or otherwise jumped and back stabbed. despite his lazy and tired appearance, dabi's pretty alert, attentive, and tense. or perhaps his appearance is because of always being on edge. burns aside.
in the end, however, he does slide the container to the side, leaving portion of the soba noodles and sauce for the other guy. dabi silently relocates the container of tofu to the table beside itadori's elbow, then picks a piece with his chopsticks. probably not smart to gorge himself on this kind of delicacy.]
Answer all ya questions?
[he figured he did. itadori might come off as stupid and naive, but dabi isn't sure he's a complete idiot. the movie explained a lot. who dabi was, his background of child abuse under endeavor's hands and the domestic abuse the rest of his family went through from the same man, his father's ambitions and who/what he sacrificed for those, as well as hawks' history and murder. the lies of the heroes and results of their deception and arrogance. throwing the society into a distrusting chaos.]
Thought I made the reasons for my actions pretty fuckin clear.
[exposure, uprooting the false heroes and hollow society to make way for the worthwhile one where there was actual freedom and truth instead of being shackled by lies and abuse. though in dabi's personal case: sadistic revenge.]
You're the hero. You should have answers for those. I don't give a shit bout killin someone.
no subject
Date: 8/26/21 19:18 (UTC)[ there's a gloomy sigh, and an equally weary expression of pure disappointment in itadori's face when he uttered those words. no, he didn't expect dabi to fulfill those questions for him, considering how he knew nothing about his situation, but for someone who's actively condemning the hero society— he kinda expected some kind of preaching on how they should do their job. then again, dabi probably has no interest in 'fixing' anything, and would rather focus on his own revenge. while bringing everyone down with him.
his father should be held accountable for his part, itadori will never oppose that. killing innocent people, who had nothing to do with dabi's past, is— incredibly irrational and selfish. regardless, to avoid repeating himself, itadori spared him the righteous lecture. dabi knew how he felt about his actions; he knew where the boy stood. if he had to pick a side, it won't be the villains.
half-sulking, he picks another piece of tofu, and with some crafty work— he'd swirl the noodles and a piece of beef into one ball, dipping it in the sauce before he pops it in his mouth. just like that! a subtle way to teach dabi the joys of fusing flavors, or his odd way of feasting. and perhaps an exhibit of his poor manners because he's talking while savoring the bite- ]
I'm sorry about what happened to you as a kid. I won't get into your family affairs, but I simply wanted to let you know I've seen the broadcast. I felt like I was sneaking around earlier. Even when you made it public ...
[ while it is a sensitive topic, it felt cruel not to express his remorse for past events. no child should go through this. dabi didn't deserve any of it. as much as itadori wished he could say it out loud, he had a feeling it will only make dabi be more uncomfortable around him. he held it back, instead conversing about something more lighthearted. ]
I bet it's hard for you to walk into a grocery store, so if you need anything ... use me? I'm a friendly face.
[ yes, he is helping a criminal, but— he's just getting him some food. a guy gotta eat! ]
no subject
Date: 8/26/21 22:20 (UTC)[dabi wasn't raised with those kinds of notions. burn harder, move faster, get stronger, whatever stands in your way is nothing to you. overcome. surpass. all that matters is being greater than *fill in the blank*. endeavor shoved his ambition down his throat and spread it through his mind until that's all he could think about. destined for greatness. deserving of the attention of his father to make those dreams come true. there was no room for, or even the experience of, softer things like valuing life or the bonds between family members. endeavor ripped out his son's brakes and then abandoned the car.
as for how heroes should do their jobs... psh. simple answer is "don't". there are no true heroes. no hero came to help him, or the rest of his family. they stood by and did nothing. let it all happen. too concerned with their own fame and glittering ranking system to give a shit about the people who needed their help. no, dabi had no interest in "fixing" anything because he didn't care about anything. only what would destroy endeavor even more. which included killing people with endeavor's own flames.
it's just a happy coincidence that he can make use of the league and the plf to forward his own agenda. hell, half the reason he wanted to toss itadori's offer out the proverbial window is because he already knows the guy won't be of any real use to him.
still, since the kid's not giving him any lectures on how he's wrong, dabi's not giving itadori tirades on the corrupt wretchedness of the heroes. it'd ruin the food.
turquoise eyes wander to the side, silently studying how the sorcerer combines the noodles around the tofu and beef piece and coats it in sauce. his chopsticks pause in his mouth during the whole process. tsk... takes a second or so, but he reaches for a piece of tofu and then tries to mimic what itadori just did. it doesn't work as well and he's left scowling at the messy grip of tofu and beef with a noodle dangling from it. not like dabi's one to talk about manners and keeping shut up with one's mouth full.]
So you watched it.
[he opts for the tofu piece, giving up on attempts at combining them. not as skilled as itadori. what really was there to say? the kid saw his past and what happened. but he knows already it won't change the guy's heroic mindset. even if he says he won't get involved, itadori's the kind of person who would jump in between dabi and endeavor and yell at them to stop fighting. just like that stupid deku kid. he cares too much.]
Now ya know everythin.
[picking up the piece of meat, he stuck it in his mouth, only to pause at that hare-brained offer floating out beside him. dabi looks at him, eyes slightly wide from surprise. then narrow a little in suspicion and maybe a tiny trace if wry amusement. use me, he says. the villain slowly draws his chopsticks out and munches on the food a few times before swallowing.]
I got other means of groceries. [especially with the league now running the plf. or what's left of it under all for one. still...] Why don't we keep doin this?
[groceries, dabi can get without a problem. a home cooked meal? not so much.]
Ya made me food.
no subject
Date: 8/27/21 21:35 (UTC)[ even when his upbringing had a huge influence in shaping him into the man he is today, itadori would like to believe there is more to dabi than pure revenge. he's not a tool, he's a human. there must be days where he just wanted to be himself, unwind, maybe entertain a secret hobby or think about an old friend. maybe think about how his life could've been if his father wasn't blinded with his unrealistic demands. you don't lose your humanity so easy.
it brings itadori back to their phone conversation. 'no one is born evil' — was it? he dwells on it as his eyes follow the way dabi attempted to mimic his craft, only to give up way too soon. in that specific scene, reading into the villain's stoic features, he can't see evil right now. all he can see is someone who got hurt, abandoned, mistreated and someone who loved his father so deeply. itadori has an intimate affair with 'evil'. if he puts dabi and sukuna side by side, they don't look alike. the contrast is: dabi can have a change of heart, while sukuna is incapable of it. why? one is human and one is not.
he takes in a subtle breath, nodding his head and sobering up; back to reality. ]
Okay! I can do that. I'll probably be gone for a bit, but I'll be back next week. Tell me what you wish for me to prepare. Oh, and I'll make sure to bring some drinks next time!
[ he breaks their eye contact, idly examining the kitchen- ... or what he could see from where they're sitting, which isn't much. he ends up unconsciously ruining dabi's personal space by leaning to his side. okay, that stove didn't look like it can function at all. ]
I don't think I could use this kitchen. I kinda wanted to. It would be nice to be able to serve it on the spot, fresh and warm ...
[ in case he wished to have something other than cold soba. speaking of which, he noticed there isn't much left of the food, just enough for itadori to pull his little trick again— but this time, he holds it up for dabi to enjoy. the gesture is clear; he fully expects him to open his mouth and accept it. it's happening. ]
Trust me. You'll love it.
no subject
Date: 8/27/21 22:17 (UTC)[but oh how much in the wrong direction that goes. he's "more" only in the sense he's experienced things his father would never want him to experience, he's grown stronger than his father (just like endeavor always wanted), he's learned skills dad never would've taught him. and all of it's spiraled right back around into this wreck that applies everything he was and is into the revenge he seeks. all of this in order to destroy the man who killed him. the rest is all burned black.
he's sicced a villain on his own brother and sorely regrets natsuo surviving because what a face it would've put on endeavor if he'd died. he's tried to murder shouto right in front of endeavor. he's killed innocent people simply because he could. there's nothing "human" about that. just want to be himself? hah, that's a joke. there's no one in here. he could only be what endeavor wanted him to be. never had a chance to learn who "touya" was. it's why "dabi" emerged from that burning mountain. touya was too weak to be anyone out from under endeavor's thumb.
might argue the 'born evil' part for a few scant examples, but for the most part, he agrees with it. it's a person's upbringing and their circumstances that affect their choices. touya never grew up thinking he'd be dabi. it was only after that night, alone, hurting, despairing, confused, and abandoned, that everything finally snapped completely. or maybe he snapped earlier, when that little shit shouto, the perfect puppet, was born and he lost everything...
true, he's not an evil spirit, not a being composed of nothing but malicious intent. but a change of heart's no longer possible. he's going to ruin his father and murder him even if it kills him. end of story. something he doubts itadori can even get his head around because of his own upbringing. they think too separately.]
I'm not makin a schedule of this. [there's a difference between making something regular and setting things in stone. with as cautious as dabi is, it should be obvious he wouldn't want someone knowing where he's going to be for any period of time in advance. itadori only got less than 24 hours warning and even that was to a vague location.] I'll call you when I want to meet.
Can ya make this again? [dabi glances at the containers.] Enough for two if ya want to share.
[when itadori leans into him to... look at something, dabi doesn't respond to it. save for rolling his eyes a little and picking up a piece of tofu. but it'll be impossible for itadori not to feel the temperature rise close to his chest and shoulder when he brings himself into dabi's space. the villain runs hot, like there's a fire inside him that won't go out.]
Won't be meeting here. I'll find another place. [something tells him this guy has no idea what keeping a low profile and working covert missions actually entails.] Bring a burner if ya want.
[ignoring the fact dabi's his own burner. he's not letting itadori or anyone use him like that, dammit. might heat up a bath for himself or a pot of water to do some ramen, but fuck acting like people's personal fire--
food.
dabi pauses, one brow furrowing in suspicion and faint annoyance when he finds a hovering spiral of noodle, beef, and tofu floating in front of his face. he glances behind it at that smile and those eyes, understanding full well itadori expects him to open up... tch, this fucking kid...
...
...
tsk, he leans in and opens his mouth, letting him do what he wants. he'll eat it anyways.]
no subject
Date: 8/28/21 21:25 (UTC)dabi wouldn't have to wait for long, and with a careful touch— he brought the piece closer and inside his mouth, holding still until the other takes the bite, pulling the chopsticks away a second later. a small droplet of the sauce lands on the corner of dabi's mouth, and out of habit, itadori used the tip of his thumb to wipe it clean. it's one of those instants when you act before you think, except in itadori's case— the realization never reached his mind. he genuinely didn't think it was a big deal.
his attention falls on the empty containers now, leaning forward to collect the lids, sealing them shut one by one as he speaks. ]
Ah, okay. Cold soba again, got it. I might try another side dish. If you have a specific request, let me know. Otherwise, I'll choose.
[ the 'bring your own burner' remark is odd, and itadori was so close to point out his fire quirk could be used in something other than burning his victims, but (luckily) he refrained from commenting. it's not illogical to predict dabi is not into that kinda thing. he might find it offensive ... ? somehow.
more importantly, itadori had a very inconstant schedule himself. jujutsu high didn't offer the luxury of a 24-hour cautionary, often ending up being called onto the scene and hearing about what they're dealing with on the way over. he might end up canceling on the villain more than he wishes for, and he's unsure if he should elaborate on his circumstances in advance— or just hope he can pull it off whenever dabi hits him up. okay, there is no point in stressing about this. itadori will deal with it in time.
with everything tucked neatly inside the lunch bag, itadori is free to face the other now, fingers idly drumming on the edge of the table. his gaze drops to the small gap between them, slowly tracing upward until he caught those eyes again. their body language spoke a thousand words; with itadori being more unguarded, and the villain heavy with doubts. while others might feel disheartened by it, itadori is anything but that. ]
Maybe next time you'll relax more ...
[ a lighthearted comment. no pressure, no sense of urgency. dabi is allowed to move at his own pace. ]
Do you want anything else from me?
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Date: 8/28/21 22:03 (UTC)don't call him 'endearing,' ya sap...he frowns a little at the sudden swipe of a thumb on the edge of his mouth, itadori getting to it before his tongue can. he'll... let him get away with it this time. it's probably a strange feeling on the kid's thumb anyways. the corner of his mouth is where three textures meet: smooth skin of his upper lip, hard metal of a staple, and tough wrinkle of the burn scar. dabi turns his head away and focuses on chewing the piece so he wouldn't have to think about the touch. itador's free to do whatever he wants in the meantime.
each container snapping shut sounds a little too loud in the quiet area, a reminder the time is over and the meal is done. well, meal yes. he's pretty sure he can easily get itadori to stay simply by doing whatever outside of attacking him or leaving. hell, the former might get him to stay for some crazy reason. protection or defense or that whole trying to reach out to him weirdness.]
No fish, no plain rice.
[anything else asides from that, he'll eat. while he'd focus more on survival than being picky, the those two in particular make him want to throw up. so there's no point in even trying to force them down his throat. there are some... bad memories associated with the taste and smell.
luckily for itadori, dabi won't take any break off of any potential set meeting as an insult. he's aware the guy has his own things going on (some day he's going to find out what) and since he refuses to give itadori more than a few hours of direct heads up, he can't expect him to be ready to go every time. it'll be hit or miss and neither of them will be tied down to the other. just the way dabi prefers it: no strings attached. besides, spontaneous meetings mean there's little way itadori can prepare anything too complex. dabi doesn't want him wasting a lot of effort on him.
attention's turned on him once again and dabi eyes him form the corner of his gaze. he's still wary, never lost the doubts about itadori's intentions. but they're sitting together, here, close, so apparently some of those guarded notions have abated or at least been lowered. the idea of relaxing around him is somewhat laughable... but also something a small flicker in his mind kind of wants to experience. he's comfortable enough around the league to actually sleep with them in the same or nearby rooms, and that says something.
but between them?]
Think ya made your intentions clear. [however, it's dabi who leans forward slightly this time, enough that faint ghost of warmth from a hot body brushes at the edge of itadori's skin. turquoise eyes meet amber, holding them without hesitation.] What do ya want from me?
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Date: 8/29/21 19:44 (UTC)with one hand holding into the band of his lunch bag, with the plan of freeing dabi from the chains of keeping his guard up around him, itadori froze just in time to hear that question. the focus on 'me' is hard to dismiss, along with the way that man got close enough to, finally, notice the inhuman warmth coming off of that body. it made him wonder if he should be threatened but chose to believe it wasn't deliberate.
back to the question— itadori always seemed to have some kind of edge in the way he regards others, eyes naturally intense. this time it was different. it's an odd thought, but he was more at ease with taking the lead this entire night. for him to approach dabi first, for him to be the one to demand acceptance, for him to reach for a touch— now it felt dabi is taking it away from him. being caught off guard a bit.
interesting. itadori never thought he would care about that. ]
I guess I wish to start ... questioning if an authority figure is always right.
[ it started with 'I don't know why I'm seeking him', but the more he indulged in a conversation with that man, it made itadori define why he found him so unique. well, perhaps dabi is not that special. every villain probably had a similar mindset, along with the rebels and those who are unmindful of the rules. not that itadori is seeking that extreme, he is still committed to doing what is expected of him. he'd save as many people he can. his loyalty will forever be to those he cares about. but-
why must he accept the fate they imposed on him? why is he deemed unworthy of saving? why isn't there an open discussion to find alternative solutions that didn't result in him being executed? he is a good person. he is doing his best.
is he allowed to ask to live?
he searched the other man's eyes, still frozen, and then slowly let go of the bag; hands dropping on each knee. ]
Also, you're an appealing distraction. It feels kinda dirty, but I've been honest in our phone call. No one talks to strangers unless they seek some sort of escape.
[ a pause, he then frowns and shifts his gaze to the side; embarrassed with wording it this way. ]
I want to be your friend. I like you, but ... how long can we keep the peace? We'll clash at some point, right?
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Date: 8/29/21 21:53 (UTC)the heat of his body isn't deliberate; that's simply how his temperature runs due to his quirk. but if itadori wants to take it as a threat, dabi's not about to try and change his mind. he's never pretended to be anything but dangerous and guarded. itadori's been the one to instigate everything, from the conversation to the offer to reach out to the food prep to even sitting beside him. it's probably the first time dabi's voluntarily responded to that lead with an actual request with himself as the offering party.
take a bit of that initiative back for himself, rather than sitting here as the reactor. the answer he gets, however, earns a wry expression. interesting topic but it's not like he's been much a voice for accepting what the authority in his life says. he's even encouraged itadori to consider his own figures above him and whether or not what they say is true, or merely something they want him to believe.]
I ain't gonna stop ya from doing that. Feel free to tell me once ya find out someone's leadin ya around.
[because he'll never trust someone with that kind of power or position. as far as dabi's concerned, they're all corrupt and untrustworthy. does he trust itadori? not really. on the surface, he can admit the kid's here for curiosity and perhaps some misguided attempt to understand and/or "help" him, even if he tries to disguise it under the name of "friendship" spawning between them. still...
it's a strange combination. dabi hasn't accepted his fate in one way, and yet has done exactly that in another. his salvation was forfeit long ago in exchange for his revenge and he'll viciously cling to the latter with no hope of the former because it's impossible for the two to coexist within his life. as for alternatives... well... blame society on that. (though he'd laugh if itadori ever called him a "good person" aloud.)
as the bag settles and things seem to shift from an imminent departure to a stay of leave, dabi continues regarding itadori's expression and face, nothing broken or open on his own. he remains as steely and enigmatic as ever.]
Oh yeah?
[he remembers the phone call, what itadori said in it, what he wanted. so that's still hanging around, huh. interesting. appealing and dirty aren't exactly bad ways to describe the distraction dabi is. a little bit flattering, in the sarcastic admittance. a sort of escape from itadori's normal life. that's entirely possible and he might actually be okay with it.]
Ya barely know me outside of that phone call and my video, but ya say you wanna be my friend and you like me. Sounds kinda desperate and shallow, kid. Not that I mind.
[as for the other part, dabi merely scoffs. peace versus battle between them is an easy answer.]
Don't get in my way and we won't.
[itadori knows now what he wants to do. so long as he doesn't interfere with that, dabi won't have much reason to attack him. it's not like he'll go out of his way to bother the kid either; he doesn't need whatever he's got going on interfering with his plans.]
As for that other thing... there's a bed in the other room.
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Date: 8/30/21 20:14 (UTC)[ -hard to unfold. itadori had some really good friends; he's not the type to struggle with creating new alliances everywhere he goes. he's not 'alone' in that aspect. it's a lot deeper than that. it might have to do with the fact dabi is oblivious to who he truly is somehow created a sense of escape? god, he didn't know anymore. it was too draining to narrow it down.
he offers the villain a flat stare. ah, don't get in the way, and we won't have a problem— yeah, that's the uncomplicated theory of it. it still felt bothersome to be told not to react, in any given situation. chances of them crossing paths in the field are slim, true, but ... don't kill someone in front of him, you! which reminds him, he needs to come up with a scheme against those flames. you know, just in case!
the bed comment barely triggered any reaction. at first! itadori ends up following dabi's gesture, glancing toward the bedroom door, blinking, staring— it hasn't reached his brain yet. aaaaany second now.
3
2
1 ... ]
Oi!
[ yup, it's here. despite the burn in his cheeks, itadori reassured himself that man simply had a weird, lewd sense of humor. if he wished to hang out with him more, he should get used to it and not take it to heart. a sigh followed, somewhat striving to be dismissive, while still keeping his eyes on dabi. it reflects on a subtle inner struggle; swinging from being tempted to rejecting the idea. either way, the sorcerer is not hating it. he really isn't used to someone being this forward with him. ]
... You didn't even want to sit next to me a minute ago, and now you're acting like everything is okay. What's wrong with you?
[ for once, this is where dabi should be wary of him. there is no need in repeating his concerns, he trusts that man is smart enough to remember the warning during their previous phone conversation. which brings him back to the hypothesis of it being a mere joke. straightening his back, itadori parodied a serious, contemplating expression— arms folded against his chest. ]
Is this really your way of asking someone to have sex? Aren't you supposed to be smooth and charming? No flirting or sweet talk?
[ he tilts his head to the side, taking it more seriously now. ]
If things turn bad, will you still agree to meet me?
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Date: 8/30/21 21:06 (UTC)and a little interesting to watch him struggle with it.
dabi has no doubts they could cross antagonistic paths. and yet, it sounds so easy to avoid doing so. the kid's already hinted about not being involved with the heroes and villains running around the society. but the secret "thing" itadori is involved with instead, the heroic nature the kid holds close to his chest, those things could very well cause friction between them if crossed. and dabi has no idea what that "thing" is. stepping on an unknown landmine trigger that makes "not my problem" turn into "getting involved" in a few seconds flat.
mah, well... he doubts he'll ever kill someone in front of itadori if this is what their interactions are going to be.
oh? no reaction? and here he thought he'd break into the flustered protests he'd been privy to on the phon-- ... never mind. the corner of his mouth quirks up in the bastard child of sneer and smirk as itadori's face blooms crimson. took a bit, but it hit. a lewd sense of humor? hardly. it's simply something the kid had brought up before and dabi found intriguing enough to needle him with. taunting people comes easy to him. doesn't believe the dismissive exhale, but he lets him get away with ducking the issue. mostly because he knows itadori's going to be thinking of it for a while.]
Oy, oy. Nothin's "wrong" with me. [the way he says it, however, implies he's well aware the opposite is very much true. there's so much "wrong" with him according to the society in which they live.] Hn, weren't ya the one who said you wanted to try it?
[towards the end of the phone call. oh he's wary of itadori. never once has he relaxes his internal guard around the kid. food and company albeit, he's still a potential threat. yeah, dabi remembers what he said about a quirk-like ability running out of control if he gets distracted enough. but he also figured itadori's a fighter. and if you can fight and still keep in control, sex can operate very similarly. besides, this kid's certainly jerked off before and no one's died from it. right?
dabi leans back to his previous perch by the table, regarding the other guy's cross-armed stance as much a bluff as it obviously is.]
This ain't that kinda porno, kid. [while he certainly can be charming and smooth, he has to want to be. and 99/100, he's not with someone he wants to be that with.] Ya think I'll dump ya cause you're bad at sex?
[the villain's eyes shift towards him, head tilting to give him a look that's curious, predatory, threatening, and intrigued. there's no fear anywhere.]
or cause you'll try to rip my throat out?
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Date: 8/31/21 20:15 (UTC)[ fun fact: he stopped jerking off the second he started sharing a body with something as taunting as sukuna. the never-ending jokes and bullying he will endure if he allowed that curse to witness such an intimate moment. in his mind, it was different if he's experiencing it with someone. less shameful? regardless, it's not like itadori is self-conscious about it. it's more of him finding it difficult to have a boner knowing his audience is sukuna. yup.
itadori squints, groaning afterward as he muttered 'stop calling me a kid' under his breath; finding it condescending. as for being terrible in bed? well, duh. he'll own up to it. he has never done it before, zero experience outside of what you see in the movies, and pretending to be a sex expert is not an option. itadori wouldn't start such rumors. if dabi is expecting a mind-blowing orgasm, that won't happen. which begs the question — why is the villain entertaining this? not only the offer is bad sex; it's also potential risk. how is that erotic in any way?
their chitchat grasps an abrupt turn, taken back by those words. his expression slipped a little on the edges, lips pressed together. this could be the first time itadori is genuinely provoked. his hand settled on the coffee table again, tapping the tip of his index finger against the wooden surface; it's hasty at first, and it slows down as his mind centered on an answer. or, in this case, another question. ]
Are you really open to this?
[ what's the point of a debate if this is nothing more than a joke. itadori can't tell between honest curiosity or teasing when it comes to that man. it's pointless to express himself if it is not taken to heart, hence he didn't bother. the displeasure on his face is unwavering, flexing his fingers, so they can cradle his cheek as he rests his head, elbow propped in support. ]
Besides, you give a vibe of someone who's selfish in bed. Am I wrong?
[ would dabi really go slow with a first timer? allow itadori the chance to explore what felt good and what didn't? is he going to be gentle or rush? it requires patience he's pretty sure dabi will refuse to offer. attraction aside, which the villain is really enticing, in spite of those scars— that's not enough to make it a good experience. ]
You don't even trust me with a kiss. Would you even allow me to touch you? Brush my fingers over your throat ...
[ what? it could happen unintentionally. in the heat of the moment. ]
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Date: 8/31/21 20:49 (UTC)[he can't deny it. growing up led to some experimenting as well. before his untimely "death" and all. then those childhood experiments went straight into the darkness, turning into another tool for survival, manipulation, or killing boredom. dabi's still completely in the dark regarding itadori's hangups about sex, though he's wondering if it's something like shigaraki's. before his "leader" managed to get more control of his quirk, if all five of his fingers touched something, the decay would start. not a fun thing to deal with when having sex. considering itadori hasn't fucked anything up from touch yet, dabi's guessing it's something else. maybe internal? concentration? remote?
tough shit. still calling him a "kid" because he is. though he might graduate to "guy" after another meeting or two. doesn't help that itadori's the same age as those u.a. kids dabi's contended with a few times already. that said, doesn't look like the other guy's (see?) going to defend himself against the suggested accusation he's gonna be bad in bed. of course he is; he's probably dealing with a fucking virgin over here. who may or may not touch himself at night. psh, still a "kid", greenhorn.
so no, he's not expecting any mind-blowing sex or even remotely good sex. hell... it's sex. he's had good, bad, painful, risky, boring, weird, dangerous sex before. itadori's not going to show him anything different. there's nothing "erotic" or "romantic" about it. sex is an action, feels good (most of the time), and best of all, for a little while during, you stop fucking thinking. about anything. that makes it addictive.
itadori goes serious and dabi knows he's struck a nerve. that's fucking rich. talk of villainy and death gets a smile and dodge, but bring up sex and suddenly there's a problem. priorities, itadori. so he provoked him. good. about time he lost that eternal smile.]
Second time I've brought it up to ya. Don't care if ya say yes or no. Won't matter to me in the end.
[one, it's not a joke. he's offering. two, it's not serious. despite the illogical contradiction, dabi's shown more caution to someone cooking for him and sitting behind him talking friendship than he's showing the offer of fucking. or, it could very well be itadori's proven himself at least somewhat trustworthy. enough to toss this on the proverbial table.
the answer he gets, in the form of some questions, however, earns a brief crack of a grin at the side of his mouth. quick, sarcastic, and amused, but it's not a negative response. so that's what he's worried about? granted, dabi can be extremely selfish in bed. take what he wants and leave as soon as he's done, screw what his partner feels about it. but that's a choice, not a practice.
he settles his jaw on his hand, elbow propped on the table as he regards yuji with a curious gaze.]
Why dontcha try to kiss me now?
[there's a brief flicker of blue flame of the side of his lips. itadori mentioned dabi doesn't trust him, but the villain's using that little flash of his quirk to suggest itadori doesn't trust him either. though he's welcome to prove him wrong...]
If I'm selfish, it's cause I wanna be.
[turquoise eyes narrow at him, taking a slightly more serious tone to that notion of fingers on his throat.] So long as ya don't try to kill me... [he lets that hover as the main stipulation. if it's just sex, it's just sex.]
You top. You call the shots. I got all night.
no subject
Date: 9/1/21 20:02 (UTC)at this point, itadori is certain words won't reach him. they will end up going back and forth, even when he expressed that he's not keen on the idea. dabi going as far as taunting him for a kiss is— shocking. but, what urged itadori's breath to stutter is the bold offer to make him take the lead. him? this virgin who never been touched before? get on top and fucking lead?
for real?
it's pretty evident dabi is looking at him as this desperate kid waiting to get his dick sucked. it's just insulting in so many ways. did he expect him to roll on his back and start wagging his tail happily? itadori didn't even notice the way he chewed on his lower lip, fingers curling into tight fists, for a brief moment, before flexing again. ]
You're used to taking advantage of people and have people treat you the same. That's why I don't think you'd object if I asked for it from our first conversation. I didn't need to make you the meal you wanted. Or, try to reassure you that I don't want to be your enemy. I'd be straightforward, get what I want, and never speak to you again. And you wouldn't mind. That's how you like it.
[ despite his words, itadori kept an easy tone. it was not deliberate to make it sound so intimate, but it was how he felt about the whole thing. truth is, he wouldn't mind a kiss. it's a soft display of goodwill, one that's not exclusive to romantic couples— or that's what itadori conceived. every time he gets a sense of being closer to that man, warm up to him, the sorcerer gets burned and pushed back again. dabi just knew how to get to him, without him fucking knowing anything about his situation.
it's terrifying— the thought of what he could do if he did. it's probably why sukuna is feeding on his toxic energy. what a show, indeed. ]
Fine, I'll kiss you.
[ there's a pause, he then grabbed the bag and pushed himself up to his feet. he stares the other down before he shrugged his shoulders. ]
I'll even fuck you. Since you gave me permission to try it out on you, right? Since you're cocky and stupidly confident, you'll be fine. I'll do it all ... when you stop acting like an asshole.
[ it can't be that hard. ]
You can do it. I've just seen it. A few moments ago. You were thankful for the homemade meal, right?
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From:yeah so the notif for this never came through. sorry for the delay!
From:it's okay! <3
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From:*cracks knuckles* and now i've finished binging jjk ~ thanks for enabling me
From:omg I'm glad you enjoyed it! <33
From:it was good~
From:yay ;u;
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